Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Can you imagine the peace and quiet? Just a flick of a switch and boom – instant silence in a noisy world 🤫 Who needs noise-canceling headphones when you've got hearing aids on standby! 😂"

aid, hearing, hearing aid, joke, off, tired, turn, turn off

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Looks like it’s just you and me tonight, family size Toblerone.

2 months ago

dessert, family, humor, indulgence, just, loneliness, looks, me, night, size, snack, Toblerone, tonight
The money I made gradually, you need urgently?

3 weeks ago

finance, humor, i, money, need, patience, urgency
Maximizing rent value by turning ‘homebody’ into an Olympic sport!

6 months ago

homebody, maximizing, maximizing value, Olympic, Olympic sport, rent, sport, turning, value
The most disturbing thing about waking up at 4 a.m. is realizing some people do this on purpose so they can exercise.

3 months ago

4, 4 a.m., a.m., am, disturbing, early, early riser, exercise, humor, morning, morning routine, most, people, purpose, riser, routine, thing, waking, waking up
Well, well, well, if it isn’t that thing I’ve been ignoring until it became a giant problem.

2 months ago

acknowledgment, giant, humor, ignore, ignoring, neglect, oversight, problem, procrastination, realization, surprise, thing, well
I love beating a dead horse with the girls. There is nothing better than a Saturday night rehashing, and never letting that horse rest in peace.

4 months ago

beating, better, conversation, dead, dead horse, friendship, girl, girls, horse, humor, i, letting, love, never, night, nothing, peace, rehash, rest, Saturday, Saturday night

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

86 shares on Telegram this month:

If I had a wife, I’d text her things like, ‘What’s your full name?’ and ‘When’s your birthday?’

87 shares on Slack this month:

Guy who normally applauds when the plane lands right before the pilot crashes it: “Boo!”

52 shares on Twitch this month:

Having a girlfriend who doesn’t post herself on social media is an underrated blessing.

18 shares on X this month:

Due to personal reasons, I will be screaming into a pillow.

13 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Promising I won’t tell anyone your secret doesn’t include my husband. He’s basically my diary.

88 shares on Reddit this month:

I believe libraries are our proof that we once valued curiosity.

49 shares on X this month:

Not texting back is only ok when I do it.

82 shares on X this month:

Engaging in deforestation (trimming my bush).

63 shares on WeChat this month:

I taught my kids about democracy tonight by having them vote on which movie to watch and pizza to order. I then picked the movie and pizza because I’m the one with the money.

92 shares on Threads this month:

If you love a friend, let them go. If they come back with coffee, it was meant to be.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Some days you are the table and some days you are the toe.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Аbsolutely crazy to thіnk that Leonardo DіCaprіo’s future gіrlfrіend іs currently nervous for her fіrst day of kіndergarten.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

When women get to a certain weight, you’ll notice they change their social media profile pictures to flowers, cats, or dogs.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Farting, but with eye contact.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

The heels stay on during sex because I only painted the toe nails that were showing.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

In an alternate universe, sex dreams of me.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

If Twitter has taught me anything, a lot of us aren’t ready for a spelling bee.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

Got fired on my first day working at the drugstore for calling my new coworkers ‘my pharmily’.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

I’m not an early bird or a night owl, I’m some sort of permanently exhausted pigeon.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

A good substitute for love and and personal fulfillment is a big bowl of fries.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

I can actually be quite charming if you would let me out of the guillotine.

Trending via WhatsApp:

It’s only a family vacation if you think “We’re never doing this again” at least once.

Trending via YouTube:

Every time I spend my own money, I feel like somebody needs to reimburse me.

Spotted on Reddit:

It’s romantic to fall in love during the collapse of society.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Every day when I get home, I thank my cats for allowing me to live in their house.

Trending via Messenger:

Every room can be a room with a view when I’m in it.

Going viral on X:

Making things weird is probably the only thing I’m good at.

Just shared via Instagram:

Can’t, I’m pulling it together.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Can’t believe I spent so many years of my life asking teachers if I was allowed to use the bathroom, and sometimes be told no. What the hell?

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Why sleep when you can stay up all night overthinking?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I can’t wait til I have hearing aids, so I can just turn them off when I’m tired of hearing everyone.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Looks like it’s just you and me tonight, family size Toblerone.

The money I made gradually, you need urgently?

Maximizing rent value by turning ‘homebody’ into an Olympic sport!

The most disturbing thing about waking up at 4 a.m. is realizing some people do this on purpose so they can exercise.

Well, well, well, if it isn’t that thing I’ve been ignoring until it became a giant problem.

I love beating a dead horse with the girls. There is nothing better than a Saturday night rehashing, and never letting that horse rest in peace.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨