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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

Twitter is for people who tried suffering in silence and realized it wasn’t for them.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Yes, I’ve gained weight. Too many people wanted to have sex with me. It was annoying.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

I don’t need a fancy watch to tell me I’m not fit one bit.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

If people continue to behave so badly, I will donate my organs to an animal shelter.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

Can someone please fix the algorithm of my life?

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

Don’t give up, we must remain silly.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

After Michael Jordan joined a religious order, he was known as Air Friar.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here doing an epic air-drum solo to ‘In The Air Tonight’.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Of course, because I’m wearing a white shirt, my coffee chose violence.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

767 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,929

Funny Quotes Topics

13,901

Funny Quotes Images

10,929

38 minutes ago

3,421

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

I’ve got a soft heart and a savage mouth. I’m like a Hallmark card written by Gordon Ramsay.

Spotted on Instagram:

Being single past 30 is like playing hide and seek, except no one is looking for you.

Trending via Reddit:

Body: Time to sleep. Brain: Hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

Just shared via Facebook:

I miss when bills had nothing to do with me.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I haven’t tried Yoga, but I bent over to pick up my keys off the floor, so I’m sure I wouldn’t like Yoga.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Your honor, if it pleases the court, I brought homemade brownies for everyone.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Tech bros are frequently wrong but never in doubt.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I’ve started eating healthier and exercising if you’re wondering why I’m in such a crappy mood all of a sudden.

Spotted on TikTok:

I am the proud father of two content providers. I mean children. Two children.

Live now on Reddit:

I don’t get vegetables on my pizza because I don’t like mixing business with pleasure.

Home » Funny Joke Quotes

1196 Funny joke quotes

Funny joke quotes are a quick and easy way to brighten your day with a punchline! 😄🎭 From classic zingers to clever twists, these quotes deliver laughs in bite-sized doses. Perfect for sharing, snickering, or simply surviving Monday. 😂🗯️📅

New funny joke quotes 👇

16 hours ago
Share →: Aliens probably have group chats called Don’t Stop on Earth.

Commentary:
Looks like we're the pit stop nobody asked for 🚀👽😅
16 hours ago
Share →: Today I was in a taxi, and the taxi driver said, “I love my job. I am my own boss, nobody tells me what to do!” Then I said, “Turn left.”

Commentary:
That's a quick way to show him who's really in charge! 😂🚖👌
1 day ago
Share →: Don’t be alarmed at my semicolon usage; I’m a professional.

Commentary:
Half semicolon, half ninja; 100% punctuation warrior! 🥷;😄
1 day ago
Share →: Wonder what I should wear to World War III.

Commentary:
Planning my apocalypse outfit: do camo and sequins clash? 🌍✨🪖
1 day ago
Share →: Here’s your daily reminder to not forget about Dre.

Commentary:
Guess I'll add 'Remember Dre' to my to-do list between existential dread and feeding the goldfish 🐟🎧😅
1 day ago
Share →: “I asked Grok. I asked ChatGPT.” Yeah, well, I asked my mom. She said no.

Commentary:
When artificial intelligence and mom intelligence collide… trust me, mom wins every time! 🤖👩‍👧✋
2 days ago
Share →: Sharpening pencils at the bin was the biggest link-up.

Commentary:
Ah, the art of bin-side diplomacy, where friendships were forged over #2 pencils and wood shavings! ✏️🗑️😄
2 days ago
Share →: Are we all getting a front-row seat to the end times, or what?

Commentary:
Guess we should've brought popcorn for this apocalyptic premiere 🍿😅📉
2 days ago
Share →: Just got hired at Five Guys as the guy who punches the burger before they put it in the bag.

Commentary:
Finally, my "smash hit" career has begun! 🍔🥊😂
3 days ago
Share →: Age regressing by coughing like a toddler, with my tongue out.

Commentary:
Coughing like a toddler is my new anti-aging secret 😂👶💨

For even more funny joke quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny joke quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

767 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,929

Funny Quotes Topics

13,901

Funny Quotes Images

10,929

38 minutes ago

3,416

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Not to brag but I don’t need alcohol to do something stupid.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

The secret ingredient to being really funny is childhood trauma.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

Can I get back all those naps I refused to take as a kid? I could really use them now.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

The real reason for global warming is that today’s young people are nowhere near as cool as we were back then.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Ground beef implies the existence of sky beef.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

As long as you’re still fishing fruit flies out of your drink, you’re not drunk.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

You are allowed to be crazy as long as you are equally as hot.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Contrary to what we currently believe, we don’t choose afternoon naps. Afternoon naps choose us.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

Cheers to all who skipped that one dish at Thanksgiving because you just didn’t trust the person who brought it.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

I love my new crockpot. Now we can wait longer to eat my horrible cooking.

Spotted on WeChat:

After I get irritated, it takes me about 2 hours to fix my face.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

That awkward moment when you try something on in a shop but you don’t know if you can get it off again.

Going viral on YouTube:

Being annoying is the most beautiful thing a woman could be.

Just shared via Facebook:

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

Going viral on WeChat:

A designated hitter in baseball is the one who has to hit for everyone in case the team is drunk.

Making waves on X:

Relationship status: he escaped.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Went to the toilet today without my cell phone. There are 245 tiles.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Sorry for the things I said when I thought you weren’t listening.

Just shared via X:

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t change clothes.

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