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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

She was rare. Like a meth head with good teeth.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

Every gift guide for men is like “A flannel flask to hold your knife flavored whiskey.”

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

I will marry a man who treats me delicately as if I’m a gift straight from heaven.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

People out here living double lives, and I’m barely even holding a single life together.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

Asking “how’s the job hunt going?” is a lot like asking “did you come?” I promise you, you’d hear if there was any success.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

The Sunday struggle is wanting to relax and wanting a clean house, but also not wanting to clean or move.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Mouse in a conference call: hold on, I’m gonna put you on squeakerphone.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Appliances always know when you’re getting a tax refund.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Parent hack: Shut your child’s bedroom door to make your house cleaner.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,313

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

If Liverpool play Real Madrid right now, both teams will lose the game.

Going viral on X:

If a door closes, you can just open it again. That is a door. Doors work like this.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Before marriage, I would sit at a stoplight for hours because I had no one to tell me the light had changed to green.

Spotted on Telegram:

Home is where you can look ugly and enjoy it.

Seen just now on Messenger:

The best part of Thanksgiving is being with family and friends, and a vast array of pies.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Feeling like Floyd in this May weather (illiterate and violent).

Spotted on WeChat:

Saw a guy reading a book and writing notes in it. Not enough words in there for ya, bud?

Shared recently on Discord:

If your boyfriend insists he rolls everywhere because it’s ‘faster than walking’, you may be dating a gamer.

Just landed via YouTube:

When people say, “Stop living in the past,” my thought in turn is, “But the music was so much better then!”

Going viral on WeChat:

I deserve a percentage of your pay if you ever stole any swag from me.

My tombstone will read “Hey there, I’m using WhatsApp!”.

Witty text about tech humor, imagining a humorous tombstone message about WhatsApp.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
📱💬 “RIP to the trendiest tombstone in town – always keeping up with the latest technology even in the afterlife! You can now WhatsApp the spirits in style! 👻💬”

, , , ,

Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on Instagram this month:

Beautiful women named Severe Thunderstorm Warning are blowing up my phone.

60 shares on Threads this month:

Going to McDonald’s to get the Grinch meal, then going to Burger King to get the Spongebob meal. Then disappearing into the forest for twenty years.

47 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Revenge is a dish best served by cutting a sandwich horizontally instead of diagonally.

93 shares on Slack this month:

An internship is only unpaid if you don’t steal enough.

48 shares on Twitch this month:

Rorschach tests are like so easy. Everything’s either a demon or a butterfly and it’s up to you to decide.

28 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My dad called my philosophy degree a “license for unemployment.”

14 shares on TikTok this month:

Sometimes, I wonder what my life would be like if I had a good haircut.

31 shares on Facebook this month:

Men be like, “I want you.” Yeah, to suffer.

59 shares on Slack this month:

Why can’t more dumb people be shy?

60 shares on Slack this month:

I bet the inventor of the cannon would be relieved to know that they’re mostly about t-shirts now.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re either snacking with me or snacking against me.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Where have you been all of my life and can you please go back there?

11 folks are currently checking 👀

At 20, I was unstoppable; at 30, I’m just unstartable.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I’d pretend to care about football for you.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I briefly stepped away from social media to get an idea of what else is going on in the world. For instance, I didn’t realize I was still married.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Hate how quietly iPhones die. At 5% it should start verbally begging for its life.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Breaking up is fine, but logging me out of your Netflix is crazy.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Some people are living proof that brain failure does not immediately lead to death.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Have you ever “accidentally” eaten a family sized bag of chips?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,692

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

You ever met someone so dumb you gotta take a deep breath before responding to them?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

My body is a machine that turns pizza into diarrhea.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

I bought my antidepressants off of Temu and now I glow in the dark.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

A beaver is an otter that has studied architecture.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

Interpretive dance is the best way to answer stupid questions.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

I like when games that have no need for a jump button have a jump button.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

What we need is an evil Santa who steals our children’s most annoying toys.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

This meeting could have been an AI summary.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

Adulting in 3 words: it’s always something.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Life hack: give yourself 8 to 12 hours of alone time in the morning to mentally prepare for the day.

Just landed via Pinterest:

The rainforest cafe won’t be authentic enough for me if they don’t bulldoze 40% of the restaurant while I’m there.

Trending via Telegram:

Baby, we believe in God around here, I don’t care what’s trending these days.

Going bananas on Twitch:

All our dogs think we quit our jobs to spend more time with them. All our cats think we got fired for being lazy.

Going viral on Slack:

When you see a squirrel, you’re bound to say, “Awww, a squirrel!”

Spotted on X:

Glory hole but for forehead kisses.

Shared recently on Slack:

Honestly, I can see why God flooded the Earth that one time.

Making waves on TikTok:

It took three employees to help me complete “self-checkout” yesterday.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I have a bit of an inferiority complex. But it’s not a very good one.

Making waves on Threads:

The only recipes they have online are where I’m the one who’s supposed to buy all this stuff and then make it. That’s not what I’m looking for.

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