Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Monday morning looks like Jack Nicholson breaking through the door in The Shining.
  • Wife is temporary. Being the hot EX is forever.
  • It’s only a family vacation if you think “We’re never doing this again” at least once.
  • My best friend is married and buying a house. I ate popcorn for dinner.
  • They need to increase life expectancy so I can squeeze in another mid-life crisis.
  • Finally got around to emptying the vegetable drawer of the fridge before something started its independence movement in there.