Funny quotes road

29 Funny road quotes

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Funny Quotes Feb 9, 2025

Stupid cow blocking the road. HOW DAIRY!

Funny Quotes Feb 3, 2025

You ever get road rage while walking behind someone moving slowly at the grocery store?

Funny Quotes Feb 2, 2025

Driving behind a salt truck on a snowy day is a Midwest police escort.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

I took the road less traveled. Where am I?

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

Who you are when you’re stuck behind a slow driver is the real you.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

I just paid my taxes. The roads should be fixed any day now.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

I love cutting off Teslas. Like you may not let me merge over but your car sure as hell will.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

I took the road less traveled because I was hoping not to run into anyone I know along the way.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

Whenever an insect rides for miles on my car, I imagine it thinking: “Oh crap, moving again!”

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Sick of people thinking the Midwest is just a bunch of small towns and cornfields when they forgot it’s also a lot of road construction, inconsistent weather, and deer that jump in front of your car.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Note to self: just because it’s in the map app’s directions, doesn’t mean the road is paved.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

I’m not good at quickly making up derogatory names on the fly, unless I’m driving.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Having to pee when you’re driving is problematic. Having to sneeze when you’re driving is even more problematic.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

It’s awesome when people honk at you for not moving when you’re letting people cross. You’re right, bro, I should just annihilate this family of four.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Took the road less travelled after buying the sat nav less expensive.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

If I honk at this person, maybe it will make them a better person.

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

Drive like no one is watching.

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

Me driving at night: I hope this is the road!

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

What genius called it road rage and not locomotive?

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

Congratulations on angrily speeding past me to get to the red light first. You’re special.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

If you fall asleep long enough, the steering wheel gives you a pillow.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

Flex on your kids by asking “are we there yet?” before they do.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

Take one positive friend and one negative friend with you on your next road trip. That way when your battery dies, you can hook cables to them and start your car.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

If you like pointing out beautiful scenery to three people who are on their phones, a family road trip is for you.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025