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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

It’s amazing, when it’s your birthday you really feel the love from family, friends, lovers, former dentists, yoga studios and various smootheries.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

Passive income? Brothers, I need massive income.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Can’t. Inventing new things to worry about.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

I get so embarrassed for no reason after posting on social media, like, why am I showing my life?

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

But if I get tinted windows, how will people see me flipping them off?

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a neurosurgeon in the middle of brain surgery.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

Cats spend two-thirds of their lives sleeping, and the other third making viral videos.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Anyone want to fall in love and split rent?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

“Are you okay?” No, it’s literally Monday every 15 minutes.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

Sometimes when I get negative feedback I’m like “Hey, only I get to talk to myself that way”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

231 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,500

Funny Quotes Topics

17,568

Funny Quotes Images

15,500

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,612

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Going viral on WeChat:

Stop wasting your money on beauty products. The secret to looking young is to wear a baseball cap with a propeller on it.

Just landed via WeChat:

That odd feeling when your lunch break is over and you still have to work for another 30 years.

Just landed via Telegram:

When a man likes you, he talks to you every day, and apparently, when you start to like him back, he is very busy and can’t talk at all. That’s how it works.

Just shared via WeChat:

Part of getting older is having a favorite pen.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

All my life lessons were learned by watching people who took my advice.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I firmly believe that at this point my guardian angel is just eating popcorn and watching the drama.

Making waves on Twitch:

I thought the noise my husband’s stomach was making was never going to end last night until I realized it was a motorbike outside.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Rain cancels plans, upsetting some and delighting others.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I wish I got hotter every time a man made me mad.

God: “I’m all-knowing but I’d rather be all-forgetting.”

2 months ago

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Commentary:
"God: 'I'm all-knowing, but honestly, sometimes ignorance looks pretty tempting… 😅🤷‍♂️🙈'"

all-forgetting, all-knowing, forgetfulness, God, humor, ID, wisdom

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

There should be a Jaws sequel where the shark finally gets arrested for his crimes and goes to jail.

0

2 months ago

arrested, comedy, crimes, humor, jail, Jaws, movie, sequel, shark, should, where
Lawyers should get walk-up songs in court like how wrestlers do.

0

2 months ago

court, entertainment, humor, lawyer, legal, performance, song, songs, walk-up, walk-up song, wrestler
I don’t know which is worse, people stealing your jokes or people not stealing your jokes.

0

2 months ago

comedy, humor, i, irony, joke, jokes, know, opinion, people, stealing, worse
I hate the saying: “Get up, the sun is shining!” What am I supposed to do? Photosynthesis?

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2 months ago

am, hate, humor, i, morning, photosynthesis, sarcasm, saying, shining, sun, wake, wake up
‘I have a ripe avocado at home’ is my favorite excuse for cancelling plans.

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2 months ago

avocado, cancelling, excuse, favorite, home, i, plans, ripe
It’s crazy windy today. Trash is blowing everywhere, so watch out for your ex.

0

2 months ago

blowing, crazy, everywhere, ex, humor, nature, relationship, today, trash, watch, weather, wind

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

40 shares on Facebook this month:

Married life: Telling your partner the same sentence 7 days in a row, only for him to say, “You definitely never told me that!”

50 shares on TikTok this month:

My ideal man is a kindhearted little freak.

13 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Lying to stupid people can give you a profound sense of satisfaction, it can also make you president.

59 shares on Snapchat this month:

Beer is Narcan for when you overdose on Microsoft Teams.

40 shares on Messenger this month:

I’ve noticed the best way to get somebody’s attention is to not want it anymore.

71 shares on Slack this month:

The problem with parental controls is I need my kid to help me figure out how to set them up.

22 shares on TikTok this month:

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

64 shares on Pinterest this month:

No place in this world is as dark as my archived chats on WhatsApp.

19 shares on Reddit this month:

One of my biggest faults is that when I ask someone their name, I forget to listen to what their name is.

63 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Airlines be like: “Oh, wow. Oh, God. We didn’t think everyone would bring a bag!”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Everyone’s a gangster until they turn a spoon the wrong way under running water.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel booking website.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Not enough rap songs about stores suddenly changing their layout.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

I’m not saying I’ve aged like fine wine, but I am currently being stored in a dark place and avoiding sunlight at all costs.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Sometimes I feel useless but then I remember I breath out carbon dioxide for plants.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

The closest I have ever come to bungee jumping was when I was born.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

My rapper name would be 2 stressd.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

You can’t spell fries without friends. I guess what I’m saying is that fries are friends. Delicious friends.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

I wish other jobs let us solve issues by releasing diss tracks. Got some sick rhymes about Debbie from accounting and her poorly structured invoicing.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

I know I seem a little crazy sometimes, but that’s because I AM.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Telegram:

Blowing over it is also dusting.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

The awkward moment when someone’s zipper is down and you don’t know whether to tell them or not.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Painted all of my red flags orange for fall.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Can’t believe penguins have to publish all those books with their tiny hands.

Making waves on WeChat:

Twitter is basically introverts gone wild.

Trending via Messenger:

People who get 0-5 likes at max and still tweet all the time… What’s your secret?

Going viral on Reddit:

Life hack: give yourself 8 to 12 hours of alone time in the morning to mentally prepare for the day.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Seeing my kids getting along, laughing, and peacefully playing together is the best minute of my day.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Life is giving me no lemons. It’s throwing watermelons.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I am at the age where I question throwing away a box because, “It’s a really nice box.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

God: “I’m all-knowing but I’d rather be all-forgetting.”

Related Funny Posts 🤝

There should be a Jaws sequel where the shark finally gets arrested for his crimes and goes to jail.

Lawyers should get walk-up songs in court like how wrestlers do.

I don’t know which is worse, people stealing your jokes or people not stealing your jokes.

I hate the saying: “Get up, the sun is shining!” What am I supposed to do? Photosynthesis?

‘I have a ripe avocado at home’ is my favorite excuse for cancelling plans.

It’s crazy windy today. Trash is blowing everywhere, so watch out for your ex.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨