Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Best threesome: me, my bed and my pillow.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

You are only young once. After that you have to think up some other excuse.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Gonna end every insult with “but in a good way”.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

I love surprising my girl, today she woke up single.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

It’s getting very expensive to be alive.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

The sexiest woman you know is trying to maintain her balance between insanity and genius.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

She’s probably just not using her phone right now for the first time ever in her whole life.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

It’s important to remember that even parents make mistakes. In fact, it’s how many of us became parents.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,524

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

Riding a bike is an insane concept. You just sit and run at the same time.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Breaking News: Jenny on Facebook is having salad for dinner tonight.

Trending via Discord:

Not being filthy rich is continuing to be a huge inconvenience for me.

Making waves on Instagram:

The idea of a relationship is so much better than the reality, bruh. I used to be angry at 7 a.m.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I woke up alive again.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Just paid my bills, so don’t ask me to come out. I’m at home getting my money’s worth.

Going viral on WeChat:

Social media may have been a mistake.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Some of you have overdosed so hard on the propaganda, there’s nothing reality Narcan can do for you.

Spotted on WeChat:

The only thing you can count on with some people is that you can’t count on them.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I wish I was a cat. No bills, no job, just meow, meow.

I’m not being smart, I’m just a skilled trained professional in pointing out the obvious.

Clever, humorous quote about confidently highlighting the obvious with a playful tone.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Well, if pointing out the obvious was an Olympic sport, you'd definitely be taking home the gold medal! Keep up the good work, Captain Obvious!"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

36 shares on LinkedIn this month:

No amount of evidence will ever persuade an idiot.

72 shares on LinkedIn this month:

“I asked ChatGPT”. I confided in Amazon. I confessed to McDonald’s. I have an inside joke with Exxon Mobil.

27 shares on X this month:

Not having a crush is dangerous. What am I supposed to think about? What if I invent something?

47 shares on Reddit this month:

You’re mistaking me with someone who’s stupid.

68 shares on Slack this month:

I have three full closets of nothing to wear.

28 shares on Messenger this month:

The web is a great place to befriend people who you’d never let in your house.

45 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Someone is probably in the worst argument of their life right now. LOL!

68 shares on Snapchat this month:

Celebrities should not be allowed to name children.

20 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Who called it an undertaker and not a host mortem?

87 shares on YouTube this month:

A big part of aging is accumulating keys and not knowing what they’re for.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

“Who does she think she is?” Well, it appears she is someone living her life unconcerned with who you think she is.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Homeless man just called me a “loser,” and I showed him my house keys.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I like people who make eye contact like they know something I don’t.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Having someone sing you to sleep is so comforting, until you realize you are the only one in the room.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, I can’t come. I’m still recovering from the last time I went out.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Due to personal reasons, I will be screaming into a pillow.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The first pyramid scheme was when the Egyptians took credit for the pyramids that were clearly built by aliens.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

In your 20s, there will be an evil narcissist demon disguised as the man of your dreams. It’s important that you run from that loser before he steals your light.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I might look calm, but in my head I’ve punched you in the face three times.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

It-is-what-it-is-ing my way through the collapse of civilization.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,370

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Easiest way to ragebait a finance bro is to start the ‘why can’t we print more money’ conversation.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

I’m so disappointed when I help my kid with her homework, and she brings it home marked incorrect.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

There are people on TV who are not ruined by fame, but who ruin fame.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Girls on their period: stay away from me; I need you.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Has anyone ever died from waiting for a group of people to decide what they want to eat.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

I am very depressed and in a really bad mood. Perhaps it will get better if I sit inside on a beautiful day and dwell compulsively.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

Don’t know how to explain this, but “hot honey” is the pickleball of condiments (derogatory).

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

Every girl keeps an extra boyfriend and calls him ‘best friend’.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

I’m a single issue voter. I’m single and it’s an issue.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on YouTube:

Every Reddit relationship post is like “My husband dropped a big piano on my head and when I emerged from the rubble my teeth had been replaced by the keys. Am I in the wrong?”

Spotted on YouTube:

Santa: “Don’t leave me milk. Leave me whiskey.”

Seen just now on Instagram:

Dear music, thanks!

Breaking via Telegram:

All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I like my Jims slim and my chances fat.

Just landed via Telegram:

Okay, new plan, I’m going to marry a Kardashian.

Going viral on Threads:

I think I look pretty okay for my age. It’s just when I hold menus two feet from my face that I know the ruse is up.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

That awkward moment when a zombie looking for brains walks right past you.

Seen just now on Slack:

It’s not that I want more shoes, it’s just that they keep making them in my size.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Unfortunately, when you don’t burden people with your problems, they assume you don’t have any. Lol.

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