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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

Bird flu? Yeah, they’re known to do that.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Happiness is an inside job.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

People who wear jeans for fun around their house have bodies buried in their backyard.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Some hoodies don’t hoodie the way other hoodies hoodie.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

Doing an hour of self-care after 23 hours of self-destruction.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

Satan: “I’d tell you to go to Hell, but I work there and don’t wanna see you everyday.”

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I’m not lazy, I’m waiting for inspiration to hit me… should be here any time now.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

If you’re doing Dry January, please, please, keep it to yourself. Nobody cares, and you’re probably even more boring without alcohol.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

“Work smarter, not harder.” Brother, I’m not doing either of those things.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Jan 20, 2026

3,535

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

When you’re using Grok, the A in Al just stands for Adolf.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I don’t even believe myself when I say I’ll be ready in 5 minutes.

Seen just now on Messenger:

In my experience, bowling and pancakes have the same energy. High hopes at the beginning, lowered self-esteem at the end.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I hate when people can’t let go of the past. Debt collectors are the worst.

Just shared via Instagram:

Asking myself if that was too weird after I hit send.

Making waves on Pinterest:

As I’m cleaning my room, this is a friendly reminder that you actually don’t need that free t-shirt or tote bag from that event.

Shared recently on TikTok:

If my toddler doesn’t sleep again tonight, I’m running away into the forest.

Spreading quickly via X:

“I’d love to go to the moon” I said “but on a full moon day of course, no point going all that way when only half of it’s there”

Just landed via Slack:

December. The month at work where everything is January’s problem.

Just landed via Threads:

I bet when you invited me to Thanksgiving dinner you didn’t think I’d stay this long.

Life is a highway and I’m afraid to merge.

6 hours ago

Humorous quote about life's challenges, comparing it to a highway and merging fears.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Life is a highway, but merging? That's where the fear kicks in 😱. Sometimes it feels like trying to merge onto the fast lane in bumper-to-bumper traffic! 🚗 Just remember, it's okay to take it slow and use your turn signal. Patience is the key to successful merging, both on the road and in life! 🚦😄"

analogy, driving, fear, highway, humor, journey, life, merge

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on Facebook this month:

When the blood pressure machine comes out for one person, the whole family has to get involved.

62 shares on Pinterest this month:

Monday: The only day when you can wear the same outfit from the day before without anyone noticing.

75 shares on Telegram this month:

I read somewhere that playing white noise helps you sleep better, but I didn’t find country music helpful at all.

12 shares on YouTube this month:

I love cutting off Teslas. Like you may not let me merge over but your car sure as hell will.

27 shares on Discord this month:

So blunt, you can smoke my truth.

92 shares on Telegram this month:

Booked an escape room but just to get away from everyone. No plans of escaping.

51 shares on Discord this month:

Welcome to your senior years, where you get mad when they rearrange the grocery store.

77 shares on X this month:

I wouldn’t walk 500 miles, and then walk 500 more.

75 shares on YouTube this month:

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

97 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m actually really fun once you get to know me (takes 3-4 years).

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Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

The first time people saw a train coming at them, they ran away in terror.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I enjoy driving because it combines my desire to sit with my talent for being angry.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Schedule your bikini wax for the first thing in the morning, and you won’t need that cup of coffee.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Waffles are just pancakes with convenient boxes to hold your syrup.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Drinking coffee because hitting people over the head with a shovel is frowned upon.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 40s: you’re not exhausted, that’s just your face now.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

It was so windy today when I was walking to the gym that I got blown into the wine store.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

May your life one day be as beautiful as you portray it on social media.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Given the amount of clowns around here, you’d think it would be more entertaining.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I made the mistake of clicking on an Instagram ad for a flannel shirt, and now the algorithm thinks I’m a lumberjack.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,684

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

People at the library need to learn how to be quiet. Some of us are trying to beatbox over here.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

First date idea: we walk around a graveyard and guess how people died.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

A Jackie Chan fight scene where he’s in an IKEA warehouse and he fights off dudes with furniture pieces, but by the end he’s accidentally assembled it all into a complete Malm bedroom set.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Can’t sleep because I keep finding exciting opportunities to get pissed off.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

“Dress for the job you want, not for the job you have” is all well and good until you’re rocking a tutu.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Starting to think I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Women are actually very understanding if you’re honest with them, especially if they like you. You don’t even have to do all that lying.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

Toddlers are like puppies, they don’t care if they’re dirty and smelly and they both have an affinity exploring the trash bin.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

The sexual tension between me and vanishing without context is insane.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

I’m sorry for the things I said when there were too many noises at the same time.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

There’s nothing scarier than sneezing with a full cup of coffee in your hand.

Spotted on YouTube:

Seems like the mosquitoes swiped right on me.

Trending via Facebook:

“AI is coming for your job.” Yeah, I’d like to see AI drink 11 coffees, then have a panic attack.

Breaking via Instagram:

Might quit my job to focus on actually putting away my laundry.

Shared recently on Discord:

Imagine being a dinosaur. No work or bills. No drama. Just extinct.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I suffer from that syndrome where your neutral expression makes it look like you’re an angry serial killer.

Broadcasted on Discord:

That one unemployed roommate who gets a package every day.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Hang in there, it gets worse.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I’m the type of idiot to be loyal during the talking stage.

Live now on Facebook:

You are the wind beneath my overly sensitive, motion-activated floodlight.

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