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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

Before they perfected the Q-tip, you have to wonder what kinds of horrific things went wrong with tips A-P.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Stay an extra hour in the office and no one cares. Arrive a few minutes late and everyone loses their minds.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Wow, you have a very impressive collection of strange tendencies.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

Remember: if nobody hates you, you’re not trying hard enough.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

Dating for love isn’t working. Now I’m dating to conduct psychological experiments and collect data.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

On one hand, it’s terrible to not have access to the Internet, but on the other hand, it’s terrible to have access to the Internet.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Why is everyone’s main goal to get married and have kids? Like, don’t you guys want to do drugs in foreign countries?

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

Dear 8 hours of sleep, I miss you so much.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,625

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

The empty spot in your bed is for snacks, not liars.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

You’re not a knight in shining armor, you’re just a knob in Under Armour.

Breaking via Instagram:

One time, I was so high my bra unclasped, and I thought I got shot.

Just landed via Slack:

Despite all my rage, I still keep refreshing the page.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Sometimes I think I’m too old to make a career change. But then I remember how Walter White went from high school teacher to drug kingpin. Anything is possible!

Just landed via Instagram:

I love when lashes make me look evil.

Going bananas on Reddit:

I have decided to purchase the grocery store because it is now cheaper than the groceries inside it.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

If you can’t look back at your younger self and realize that you were an idiot, you are probably still an idiot.

Spotted on YouTube:

The economy’s so tough, people out here eating grass — matcha.

Freshly posted on X:

The reward for doing really good work is more work.

“Angry on the internet” is such an unfortunate personality.

1 day ago

Funny Quotes

Witty quote about online anger, highlighting a humorous personality trait.

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Commentary:
When your keyboard takes it personally 😂👀 #ChillVibesOnly #DigitalRage

anger, angry, behavior, humor, internet, online, online behavior, personality, unfortunate

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Social Media Stars ⭐

94 shares on YouTube this month:

If you ever see me running, it’s either away from my problems or towards an ice cream van.

22 shares on YouTube this month:

Not to brag, but I was unhinged way before it was cool.

55 shares on Facebook this month:

Sometimes I’m grateful that thoughts don’t appear as bubbles over our heads.

28 shares on Messenger this month:

People who wear jeans for fun around their house have bodies buried in their backyard.

19 shares on Telegram this month:

I had zero respect for my boss until he started appearing exclusively by hologram.

21 shares on Facebook this month:

“New password cannot be your old password” makes me so mad.

59 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’ve just found my wide pants again. They weren’t gone at all, they’re just my tight pants now.

80 shares on Slack this month:

All I know for sure is that I could be wrong.

60 shares on TikTok this month:

Current situation: lying in bed, trying to manifest breakfast.

86 shares on Threads this month:

Car insurance should give you back money at the end of the year for having no accidents.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

The first 120 hours after the weekend are always the worst.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

“I’m gonna decide everyone’s pronouns and sexuality tonight. And, yes, there will be some big surprises.”

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

You can’t argue with me because I’ll just agree with you until you leave.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped school.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Narcissus fell in love with his own image, but was immediately annoyed at how it always tried to talk while he was talking.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

I love reading a menu. Look at all this stuff I want to eat.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

I just sneezed next to my computer and the anti-virus popped up.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

If you get bitten by a snake and you’re not sure if it was poisonous, simply wait to see if you die or not. That should give you your answer.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Hello, boyfriend? It’s me, girlfriend, from dating?

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

Probably the most humiliating thing that can happen when you die is that you come back as a fitted-sheet ghost.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I’m glad cars were invented. Imagine riding a horse at 3 a.m., coming back from the club.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I slept for 11 hours last night, just wanted everyone with kids to know that.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Respect people who wear glasses because they paid money to see you.

Just shared via Slack:

There is no sex. I lied. You are gonna lay here and take personality quizzes with me.

Spotted on Threads:

I don’t mean to brag, but I can forget what I’m saying while I’m saying it.

Making waves on Facebook:

I wish my hair had as much volume as my mouth.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t change clothes.

Just shared via Twitch:

I’m going to die from jealousy one day.

Just landed via Facebook:

I remember when asking someone if they were on X meant something completely different.

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Activity Log ✨

“Angry on the internet” is such an unfortunate personality.

I will never be the person this serving size suggestion wants me to be.

Rock bottom should give me free sandwich and coffee for how often I hit it.

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

It’s so embarrassing when you make a silly face at a baby, and they do not care at all.

You never forget your first kiss. Or your first meeting with HR.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“Angry on the internet” is such an unfortunate personality.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I will never be the person this serving size suggestion wants me to be.

Rock bottom should give me free sandwich and coffee for how often I hit it.

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

If I unsubscribe from your email list, I definitely do not need you to send a follow-up email to confirm.

It’s so embarrassing when you make a silly face at a baby, and they do not care at all.

You never forget your first kiss. Or your first meeting with HR.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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