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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

Play the Grindr notification noise at Christmas dinner to see which conservative relatives panickedly check their phone ringer.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

The year flies by when you’re scrolling.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

The world was better off when street gangs settled things with choreographed dance battles.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

You can tell a lot about a person by breaking into their home and going through their belongings.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

Kinda miss being a child and wondering why the moon follows me.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

One thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks I’m dumb.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

I used to love going out with people. Now I weigh the pros and cons of human interaction, like it’s a business decision.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Sometimes, before bedtime, I fall asleep on the couch. It’s my little sleep appetizer… my nappetizer.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

I talk a lot of shit for someone who is startled by my own toast popping up while I’m watching it. Every. Single. Time.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

Twitter is a weapon of mass distraction.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,265

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I have a sundress and no man to bend me over in it, sad day.

Just shared via Discord:

Today’s politics make me think we’re living in a movie where the villains actually win.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

My cat’s in a bad mood, despite eating and sleeping all day.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I wish I had the free time of someone who leaves a positive Amazon review for a rake.

Making waves on Facebook:

Making food: 1 hour. Eating food: 20 seconds. Washing dishes: never ending.

Just shared via Reddit:

Can’t wait to overuse the “My husband said,” “Let me phone my husband,” “I’ll ask my husband.”

Trending via TikTok:

The one thing to know about me is I always get the last laugh. And oh yes, it’s maniacal.

Just shared via Slack:

Nothing ruins a Friday like realizing it’s only Wednesday.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Good morning, may your coffee be strong and your boss not weird today.

Going viral on WeChat:

I wish people knew how good I can sing when I’m alone in my car and in my shower.

Caffeine: the adult version of fairy dust.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"☕✨ Sprinkle that magic, and watch as the 'productivity' appears out of nowhere! 😂💪 #CoffeeSpells"

adult, caffeine, coffee, dust, energizer, fairy, fairy dust, humor, magic, version

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Scientists say humans are the most evolved, but bears get to get fat all summer and then sleep for four months, so who’s really ahead.

0

2 months ago

ahead, bears, evolution, fat, humans, months, say, scientists, sleep, summer
“It is what it is,” I say, not really knowing what it actually is.

0

2 months ago

actually, confusion, humor, i, irony, it is what it is, knowing, perspective, say, self-awareness, uncertainty
Cicadas are all like, “Y’all mind if I scream?”

0

2 months ago

cicada, humor, i, insects, mind, nature, scream, sound, summer
Anyone want to fall in love and split rent?

0

4 months ago

anyone, dating, fall, humor, love, relationship, rent, romance, roommate, want
What are some fun beginner crimes for someone getting into lawlessness?

0

2 months ago

activity, beginner, crime, fun, getting, lawlessness, someone
Don’t cry because it’s over. Cry because you have an extra hour to think about it.

0

2 months ago

cry, extra, hour, humor, over, reflection, think

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on WhatsApp this month:

What are y’all gonna do when those labubus come to life and start biting y’alls ankles?

70 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m basically a taxi today for the kids and dogs.

33 shares on Instagram this month:

I miss when people didn’t talk on speakerphone in public.

93 shares on X this month:

Don’t interrupt me while I’m embarrassing myself.

45 shares on Facebook this month:

Nightmares are so embarrassing. Why is my anxiety working the night shift?

67 shares on X this month:

Me leaving the house: I hope I don’t see anyone.

45 shares on Discord this month:

“So if I had kids, my kids would never…” Spoiler: Yes, they would.

38 shares on WeChat this month:

90% of the things I worry about never happen. Worrying works.

11 shares on TikTok this month:

Might start a YouTube channel “will it hurt if I drop it on my foot”.

10 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Imagine if you spent all your time studying, actually studying.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

My Indian name would be “Stares at Phone All Day.”

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

I love it when strangers smile at me and I smile back, and we have that nice stranger smiling moment.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

I miss the days when our biggest argument was whether West Coast or East Coast rap was better.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

I think it’s time we acknowledged how incredibly stupid most super wealthy people are.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

My phone went from fully charged to 10% while I was sleeping, so I guess it leads a more exciting nightlife than I do.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

I wish that reading books in the park were my job, and I got paid six figures for it.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that everything is going to be OK.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Always remember, if you ever need me, I’m just several phone calls and unread texts away.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

The most embarrassing thing in the world is when you make a fool of yourself in front of a baby and it doesn’t laugh.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Employees should have to take their boss’s last name.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I’m going to start reading books again, as soon as I finish the internet.

Breaking via Telegram:

The French only eat snails because they don’t like fast food.

Making waves on Slack:

I love single sign-on because you only have to sign on once, 8 times a day.

Spotted on Instagram:

I really don’t care what happens to me romantically anymore.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Coconut water taste like it’s been in someone else’s mouth.

Making waves on Threads:

You should be allowed to leave work early if you are really in love.

Going viral on Messenger:

If Halloween is over, then why am I still scared?

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Having a daughter is like having a little broke best friend who thinks you’re rich.

Just shared via Discord:

“I’m at a point in my life where I don’t go anywhere unless I absolutely have to.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Caffeine: the adult version of fairy dust.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Scientists say humans are the most evolved, but bears get to get fat all summer and then sleep for four months, so who’s really ahead.

“It is what it is,” I say, not really knowing what it actually is.

Cicadas are all like, “Y’all mind if I scream?”

Anyone want to fall in love and split rent?

What are some fun beginner crimes for someone getting into lawlessness?

Don’t cry because it’s over. Cry because you have an extra hour to think about it.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨