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Commentary:
"Well, if you want a party that's really 'bleating' edge, go ahead and fill up those animals with helium 🎈🐐 Who knows, maybe they'll finally reach new heights in their social circles! Just make sure they don't take off and become the G.O.A.T. of the skies! 🚀😂"

activity, animals, floats, goat, helium, humor, weird, whatever

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Nothing more rude than taking a photo of yourself and it looking like how you actually look, and not how you look inside your head.

1 month ago
expectations, head, humor, inside, looking, nothing, perception, photo, reality, rude, self-image, selfie, truth, yourself
Evenings after work finish too quickly, one meal, one show, and it’s already tomorrow morning.

2 months ago
after, evening, finish, meal, morning, night, relaxation, routine, show, sleep, time, tomorrow, too, work
Coffee tastes so much better handed to me.

1 month ago
better, coffee, convenience, enjoyment, handed, humor, me, much, taste
Many people mistake me for an adult because of my age.

1 month ago
adult, age, humor, irony, maturity, me, mistake, people, self-perception
It’s so funny when someone writes a song to try to get someone to have sex with them. That’s what a bird would do!

1 month ago
bird, creativity, flirting, humor, nature, relationship, sex, someone, song
I lied, there’s no sex. Stand over there and tell me if this painting I’m hanging is straight.

1 month ago
art, hang, humor, lie, painting, relationship, sex, straight, tell

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

Having a crush is so stupid. Like, why is this dude in my head at 8 am?

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

The me who snips coupons needs to communicate better with the me who walks into the stores.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

Maybe everyone can just pee outside from now on so I never have to clean the toilets again.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

I always take two stairs at a time, that way if I fall, it’s only half the distance.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

I love when women move on. It’s my favourite genre.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

“It could be drugs,” I tell myself as I buy more books.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

I have browser tabs open that are older than you.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Twitch:

If we start flirting now, we could be in matching pajamas on a Christmas card before the holidays.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Go ahead and use that semi-colon; no one will know you’re doing it wrong.

Spotted on Instagram:

Shopping at the dollar store makes me feel rich and poor all at the same time.

Seen just now on Discord:

Quitting my job to pursue my true passion: not working.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Ever since I learned about the concept of networking, I knew I was going to have to do everything alone and do it the hard way.

Live now on Pinterest:

Just a reminder that with Die Hard, Robin Hood and Love Actually, ‘Alan Rickman ruins Christmas’ is a whole movie subgenre.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

I don’t know what kind of sex makes y’all want a joint bank account, but I ain’t had it yet.

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Activity Log ✨

Filling animals with helium is kinda weird, but whatever floats your goat.

Nothing more rude than taking a photo of yourself and it looking like how you actually look, and not how you look inside your head.

Evenings after work finish too quickly, one meal, one show, and it’s already tomorrow morning.

Coffee tastes so much better handed to me.

Many people mistake me for an adult because of my age.

It’s so funny when someone writes a song to try to get someone to have sex with them. That’s what a bird would do!

I lied, there’s no sex. Stand over there and tell me if this painting I’m hanging is straight.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I am “I can’t remember the last time I went out on New Year’s Eve” old.

The Airbnb reviews never tell you how comfortable the toilets are for falling asleep on.

Santa keeps a pair of mounted antlers over his fireplace to keep the reindeer from unionizing.

“Your boos mean nothing to me. I’ve seen what you cheer.” Is a goated doctrine. If Rick and Morty gave us anything, it gave us that.

I’m sorry for inventing the universe.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Ever since I was young, I wanted to check my email for a verification code.

Welcome to your 50s, there’s a wrong way to stretch now.

A song that hits so hard it makes you want a cigarette.

I found out my husband was cheating on me at a Linkin Park concert. We tried so hard and got so far, but in the end, it didn’t even matter.

Thank you, God, for another day. Let’s get this 12-hour screen time.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

My brain at 2 a.m.: “You up?”

I’ve done the math and I regret to inform you I’m your soulmate.

Feeling melancholy. Think I’ll have a drink and make things much worse.

Are you stupid, sand? You could just lay here forever on this beautiful beach, but no, you have to try with all you’ve got, to get into my shoes.

My dentist said my teeth were stained and asked if I smoke or drink coffee? I said, “I drink it.”

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

It’s Friday. I ran out of small talk on Tuesday. Please leave me alone.

Do you laugh at your own jokes, or are you emotionally stable?

All this overthinking, and I still make the worst decisions.

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Filling animals with helium is kinda weird, but whatever floats your goat.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Nothing more rude than taking a photo of yourself and it looking like how you actually look, and not how you look inside your head.

Evenings after work finish too quickly, one meal, one show, and it’s already tomorrow morning.

Coffee tastes so much better handed to me.

Many people mistake me for an adult because of my age.

It’s so funny when someone writes a song to try to get someone to have sex with them. That’s what a bird would do!

I lied, there’s no sex. Stand over there and tell me if this painting I’m hanging is straight.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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