116 funny weird quotes - Wordgag

Billionaires are so weird. What are you saving up for? Hell?

May 28, 2026

Sitting in an antique chair is weird, like this thing has seen so many butts.

May 28, 2026

I’m gonna turn all this pain into something beautiful, like a poorly timed joke that makes everyone feel weird.

May 28, 2026

Airplanes are so weird because how does a giant metal box stay in the air like that, and why am I craving tomato juice?

May 28, 2026

Sundays are weird. You want to relax, but your brain’s like, “Shouldn’t you be panicking about something?”

May 28, 2026

I regret to inform you all that I just plan on getting hotter and weirder.

May 28, 2026

My wife has a weird habit of starting conversations by saying, “Are you even listening to me?”

May 28, 2026

“I” before “E,” except when your foreign neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from weird, feisty, caffeinated weightlifters.

May 28, 2026

It’s weird when you realize we are the last generation on this Earth to know what lite was like before social media.

May 28, 2026

Using my invisible hula hoop really freaks people out.

May 28, 2026

Stop worrying about being weird and start being weirder.

May 27, 2026

That’s kind of sexy of you to be a little weird.

May 27, 2026

Sorry for acting weird. It’s just that I mirror people, and you were being weird first.

May 27, 2026

Balloons are so weird. “Happy birthday, here’s a plastic sack of my breath.”

May 27, 2026

Sorry, I can’t talk right now. The seam of my sock feels weird.

May 27, 2026

Whoever first said, “I’m in a pickle,” must have had the weirdest day.

May 27, 2026

Weird how I can’t seem to reach anything at the grocery store when hot men are around.

May 27, 2026

Due to unforeseen circumstances, I will be acting weird today.

May 27, 2026

Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

May 27, 2026

Feeling weird from my cookie-based diet.

May 27, 2026

Pretty girls don’t compete. We sit pretty, count blessings, and ignore weird energy.

May 27, 2026

Hey, sorry I acted weird the other day. I was trying so hard to act normal that it backfired.

May 26, 2026

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I’d grow up to be a weird freak.

May 26, 2026

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at intimacy.

May 26, 2026

They get real weird at the gun store if you walk in crying and asking for “the biggest one”.

May 26, 2026

Weird. I’m the only one naked at this gender reveal party.

May 26, 2026

I mostly choose to stay silent in weird situations but my face has subtitles.

May 26, 2026

Isn’t it weird we have a little voice in our head, like the one you’re using to read this?

May 26, 2026

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at social gatherings.

May 26, 2026

Uh oh, said somethin’ weird. Better fix it by saying something even weirder.

May 26, 2026

Doesn’t matter if the chicken or the egg came first. Still a weird thing to just appear.

May 26, 2026

It’s kinda weird that in order to go to sleep you have to pretend like you are already sleeping.

May 26, 2026

People who don’t talk to themselves are the weird ones.

May 26, 2026

Being weird never goes out of style.

May 26, 2026

Don’t worry, nobody noticed the weird thing you did. They’re too busy with the weird thing you said.

May 26, 2026

“You’re acting weird!” I’m not acting.

May 25, 2026

You ever get into such a weird mood you have to put yourself on house arrest for a couple days?

May 25, 2026

The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it’s too late for them to back out.

May 25, 2026

Armed robbers are so weird. Why are you beating me when I don’t have money?

May 25, 2026

If you’re going to be weird, be confident about it.

May 25, 2026