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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

What we need is more companies making hot sauce. I need 900 more ways to taste a thing that tastes exactly like all the other ones.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

I hope my parents feel proud. They scared me so bad about getting pregnant as a teenager that now they’re never getting grandkids.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

Women always want to marry intelligent men. What they don’t know: Intelligent men don’t want to marry.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

I love my cat so much, but how the hell are you that small and take up an entire queen-size mattress?

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

Not having a crush is dangerous. What am I supposed to think about? What if I invent something?

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

Corporate life requires an ass-licking skill set I simply wasn’t born with.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

As you get older you become all of the seven dwarfs.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Sleep hits different when you’re not supposed to be sleeping.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

No one is shocked when a defibrillator doesn’t work.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,928

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Slack:

My dog sure does give a lot of side eye for someone without a job.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

I made some bad choices in life, but I never bought a pair of Crocs.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

This summer I’m going cicada mode: emerging briefly from my house and being really loud until I find a mate.

Shared recently on Slack:

I always fear that one day I will enter my house and find a thief, knocked out unconscious by the things fallen on his head from some closet.

Just shared via WeChat:

Moment of silence for those who received mugs that aren’t microwave- and dishwasher-safe.

Live now on Slack:

For this Halloween I’ve trained my eyebrows to leap off my face and destroy those who’ve angered me.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

YOLO because stupid people don’t know what Carpe Diem means.

Live now on Threads:

The best plans on a Friday night are no plans.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Sometimes it’s not a secret, it’s just none of your business.

Trending via YouTube:

I want time to watch more films, but I also want time to read more books, but I also want time to look at more nothing.

1210 Funny sarcasm quotes

More funny sarcasm quotes 👇

The thing I can’t get over about Love Island is they’re only allowed 2 drinks a night, like they’re all just acting like that.

0

2 months ago

2, acting, alcohol, allowed, drink, drinks, humor, i, island, just, limitation, love, Love Island, night, only, over, reality, reality show, sarcasm, show, thing
Imagine thinking you have any clue what’s going on.

0

2 months ago

clue, confusion, going, humor, ignorance, imagine, sarcasm, self-awareness, thinking
I love when someone texts “hey,” like I’m supposed to solve the rest.

0

2 months ago

communication, conversation, etiquette, humor, i, love, media, message, rest, sarcasm, social, social media, solve, someone, texting, texting etiquette, texts
Am I just getting older, or are people getting more annoying?

0

2 months ago

aging, am, annoyance, annoying, getting, humor, i, just, observation, older, people, sarcasm
Imagine hating me, and I’m just here unloading my dishwasher.

0

2 months ago

attitude, chore, daily, daily chore, dishwasher, hate, here, humor, imagine, just, me, sarcasm, unloading
We should make a new internet that’s as hard to use as the old internet was, so anyone that’s too stupid to have used the internet 20 years ago can’t get on it.

0

2 months ago

20, access, age, ago, anyone, digital, digital age, experience, hard, humor, internet, internet user, new, old, old internet, online, online access, sarcasm, should, stupid, technology, too, usability, used, user, user experience
I just went to Crazy Town, and they said you’re a local legend.

0

2 months ago

crazy, crazy town, humor, i, joke, just, legend, local, local legend, said, sarcasm, town
You’re my least favourite notification.

0

2 months ago

communication, digital, digital communication, favourite, humor, least, least favourite, message, notification, sarcasm, text, text message
I would like to unsubscribe from all responsibilities, please and thank you.

0

2 months ago

adulting, humor, i, life, please, request, responsibility, sarcasm, stress, thank, unsubscribe
What a time to be alive! (Derogatory)

0

2 months ago

alive, derogatory, exclamation, expression, humor, irony, life, modern, modern life, sarcasm, time

For even more funny sarcasm quotes, hit next 👇

All funny sarcasm quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

96 shares on WeChat this month:

I am so out of shape right now, that if someone yelled “run for your life!” I’d be like “ya’ll go ahead, I’m meetin’ Jesus today!”

31 shares on Discord this month:

Please don’t leave me to my own devices. They’re all out of batteries.

26 shares on Snapchat this month:

I accidentally bought a pair of nose-cancelling headphones and now my glasses keep falling off.

90 shares on Twitch this month:

Cataclysmic events, such as your fingers on my skin.

99 shares on Pinterest this month:

Twitter is the black sheep of the web, always in the corner, loudly arguing with itself.

70 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I was raised to be humble which I excel at cause I excel at everything.

53 shares on Telegram this month:

The reward for doing really good work is more work.

61 shares on Messenger this month:

I said “cool tattoo” to be nice not because I wanted to hear the 45 minute origin story.

70 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m so lazy that I’ll break my tooth trying to get this tag off before I get up and get a scissor.

53 shares on TikTok this month:

I can’t think of a single email that has ever found me well.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

I’m going to get some steel wool so I can crochet myself a new car.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Used dark mode so much that I became physically repulsed when I see a white screen.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

I deal with my personal problems the same way I study for tests, I don’t.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

Yeah, sex is great, but have you ever checked your bank account and had way more money than you expected.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

I hope this email blows your head smoove off.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

“AI is coming for your job.” Yeah, I’d like to see AI drink 11 coffees, then have a panic attack.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Pouring rain, football on TV, empty house; the stuff dreams are made of.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Hey girl, are you a burger? Because I love you.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

Nose so runny it just signed me up for a 10k.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

In the 80s, if you woke up feeling thirsty, you could drink some of your waterbed.

Making waves on TikTok:

My life would be pointless without cheese. Or as the famous song goes: “Ain’t no sunshine when cheese gone!”

Seen just now on Slack:

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently, and I’ve decided that I really don’t want to do that any more.

Live now on X:

Holding it together with duct tape and sarcasm.

Freshly posted on Slack:

When they have a dream sequence in a movie, how do they film the person’s dream?

Just landed via Instagram:

Someone yelled “hey, retard!” and I looked back.

Just shared via Discord:

If biscuits were slimming and contained every nutrient the human body needs, I’d be in terrific shape.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

What a time to be alive! (Derogatory)

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

My chess strategy is eating one of your pieces every time you look away.

Activity Log ✨

1210 Funny sarcasm quotes

More funny sarcasm quotes 👇

All funny sarcasm quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨