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31 Funny ugly quotes

More funny ugly quotes 👇

  • I was an ugly baby. It’s been downhill since then.

    Commentary:
    “Looks like the path of zero return started early for this person! 👶📉 Let’s hope they peaked in cuteness and not just in self-deprecation! 😂 #BabyGoneBad”

  • I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

    Commentary:
    “Well, if you were told the ice cream machine was broken at McDonald’s, you might want to take that as a compliment in disguise! Who knew getting denied ice cream could be a subtle flattery? 🍦😂 #IceCreamDiscrimination”

  • Stop asking me if I’m tired. Can’t I just be ugly?

    Commentary:
    “Stop asking me if I’m tired. Can’t I just be cultivating my natural ‘I woke up like this’ look? 🤷‍♀️💤 Beauty sleep is so last season, darling! 😆”

  • Note to self: No more bitching about ugly furniture with people at IKEA whose home you haven’t been to yet.

    Commentary:
    “Note to self: Before critiquing that questionable IKEA furniture, make sure to first visit their house and assess the situation… You might just find a gem hidden behind those assembly nightmares! 💎🪑😂”

  • Never faked an orgasm before, but the joy of ugly presents.

    Commentary:
    “Never faked an orgasm before, but let’s just say the joy of ugly presents comes pretty close! 😂🎁 Who needs fancy gifts when you can laugh your way through the holiday season with some truly unique and questionable presents? Embrace the quirks and keep those surprises coming!”

  • My mother still has some really ugly things from the 90s. My older brother, for example.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the 90s, a time of questionable fashion choices and regrettable trends. Seems like your older brother fits right in there with mom’s collection of ‘ugly things’! 🙈😂 #ThrowbackFashionDisaster”

  • Buying new glasses this week, so a whole bunch of you are about to get a whole lot uglier.

    Commentary:
    “Watch out, folks! 🤓 New glasses incoming, so prepare for a serious downgrade in your attractiveness levels! 😂 Time to recalibrate those standards! 👓😉”

  • Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.

    Commentary:
    Looks like some women have a talent for consistency! 😂💸 Double whammy for the poor guy! Looks like he’s in a lose-lose situation, no matter what 💔 #GoldDiggerAlert

  • Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer to call it selective participation.

    Commentary:
    “Wow, selective participation sounds so much fancier than lazy! 💁‍♂️ Who knew sitting on the couch binge-watching Netflix was actually a sophisticated choice? 🛋️📺 Embrace your inner selective participant! 😆”

  • I’m like 2% cute and 98% ugly.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the classic case of ‘beauty is in the eye of the beholder’ 🤔 Well, just remember, being 2% cute is still better than being 100% boring 😉💁‍♂️”

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