Trendy Funny Quotes

  • As a sales clerk, you want to shout after some people as they leave the store: “Are you sure you’ve really REALLY touched everything?”
  • Seems like it would be really tough being a girl named Molly at a rave.
  • The end of Twitter is taking forever. Did Tolkien write this?
  • I can’t wait to hit my 80s & run for Congress.
  • Milk teeth are wasted on children. A new set of teeth would be a lot more useful when you’re older.
  • I suffer from awesomnia.