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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Whenever I’m with real yappers, I realize I might actually be a listener.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Sure, breakups are hard, but have you ever had to wait for your phone to stop ringing so you can start using it again?

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

I’m afraid that AI will quickly realize that the biggest problem on Earth is humans – and then solve the problem.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

“I’m gonna decide everyone’s pronouns and sexuality tonight. And, yes, there will be some big surprises.”

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

I’ve cut my fingernails too short and now I can’t open my shower gel. What’s the point of being well-groomed if I can’t smell like mangos?

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Life sucks a lot less when your feet are in a creek, and you forgot your phone in the truck.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Why can’t hackers just delete everyone’s bad debt, credit, and mortgages?

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

I be having full arguments in my head, then walk around mad like someone actually said something to me.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

You don’t become cooler with age, but you do care progressively less about being cool, which is the only true way of being cool. This is called the Geezer’s Paradox.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

When people ask me what is more important, food or love, I don’t answer because I’m eating.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,754

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

The two types of video games are kill everything that moves and Microsoft Excel.

Making waves on Instagram:

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

Shared recently on Threads:

Village life is when you send two kids out to play and six kids come back hungry.

Live now on WhatsApp:

Some people identify as funnier than they actually are.

Just shared via Facebook:

Horoscope: You will give blood generously this week, but it won’t be your idea.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Please continue to leave me out of the loop.

Making waves on YouTube:

Life is like a roll of toilet paper, the closer to the end you get, the faster it goes.

Just landed via Twitch:

I love saying “my man” and not his name, so when I get a new one, nobody knows.

Breaking via X:

I think Cinderella should have lived a happy life with all her animal friends rather than settle for a man who had her try on a shoe because he didn’t recognize her without makeup.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

As long as you’re still fishing fruit flies out of your drink, you’re not drunk.

Half of all the problems in life can be solved by duct tape. For the rest, you’re gonna have to reboot that computer.

4 weeks ago

Clever humorous quote about fixing problems with duct tape and rebooting computers.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Remember folks, duct tape fixes almost everything, from leaky pipes to broken hearts… 🛠️💔 But when it comes to dealing with technology tantrums, brace yourselves for a good ol' reboot dance 💻🔄. Just another day in the life of a tech-savvy problem solver! 😂"

computer, duct, duct tape, humor, life, problems, reboot, rest, solution, tape

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

41 shares on TikTok this month:

Is it possible to die of horniness? Asking for a friend.

41 shares on Snapchat this month:

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

20 shares on Instagram this month:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, so eat that cake today.

98 shares on Facebook this month:

I haven’t exaggerated in like a million years.

97 shares on Instagram this month:

Dogs have two jobs: calm their humans when they are stressed. Stress their humans when they are calm.

19 shares on Reddit this month:

Is there anyone here old enough to remember when typing was a class in high school?

84 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Your 20s are for developing attachments to people who will haunt you for the rest of your life.

88 shares on WhatsApp this month:

They should make you watch a training video and pass a little test before you’re allowed to touch the office coffee maker.

71 shares on Reddit this month:

Whatever you do today, do it with the confidence of a 4-year old wearing a Batman cape.

75 shares on Twitch this month:

It’s crazy that things have got to a point where you can say, “Jurassic Park 3 is one of the better movies in the series.”

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Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Shazam but for random noises outside.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate being at the age where you feel obligated to buy your whole family gifts for Christmas, but also the age where your bank account doesn’t feel obligated to support that.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re partying with your cousin and you’re asked if you’re related, “Our parents are siblings” will cause a lot of confusion.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

A more accurate description would be ‘The Darker Web’.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Being naked with headphones on is so fun.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry you thought I I was flirting with you; I had something in my eye.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t stop thinking about how a tanning bed really turns you into the human version of a gas station hot dog.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Pornhub be like “Your phone got a virus,” bro, just play the bloody video.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Eatіng іn bed іs much better. Everythіng’s a napkіn.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Good morning to everyone except those who need approval from strangers on the internet.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,675

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Deciding if I should heal or just give up and go completely insane.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

My wife has the worst taste in men.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Red Bull doesn’t give me wings, it gives me gas.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

The three people who like every single one of my posts are going in my will.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

When you get angry, take a breath and count to ten. Throw a punch at eight. Nobody expects that.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Netflix will help you finish spelling the name of the movie you’re looking for, and then tell you they don’t have it.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

“Communism sounds good in theory, but doesn’t work in practice.” Capitalism doesn’t even sound good in theory.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

I’m awake and working. Please respect my privacy during these trying and emotional times.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

I wonder if babies know that we are more terrified of them than they are of us.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Being an adult is realizing $1000 is little money to have, but a lot to owe.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

Nowadays an “all-nighter” means I didn’t have to get up to pee.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

When I turned into the harbor of marriage, I didn’t know that a warship was anchored there.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

True luxury is sleeping until you wake up by yourself.

Going bananas on Facebook:

I got so lost there for a minute (several years).

Just shared via YouTube:

Honestly, I can see why God flooded the Earth that one time.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

There’s nothing worse than accidentally becoming an important person at your job.

Trending via Telegram:

Cars should come with a secondary smaller “sorry” horn for when you do something a lil silly by accident.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Did you know? By replacing your coffee with green tea, you can lose up to 92% of what little joy you still have left in your life.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I don’t care for small talk. I prefer awkward silence.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Wisdom of the day: Don’t do anything you don’t want to explain to the paramedic.

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