Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Get married and have kids so that you can Google things like “How to teach your kid to not bite”.
  • The real advantage of being self-employed is that you don’t have to go to a Christmas party.
  • Dentists get rich by staring into your mouth for 30 seconds, playing sinking ships with their assistant, and then telling you to brush better.
  • Not to be dramatic, but learning how to read has ruined my life.
  • I wonder how many different vegetables they exploded before they discovered popcorn.
  • The best part of vacation with your extended family is talking shit about them on the trip home.