Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Companies post open positions online and then ask you why you applied to them.
  • Forget the alarm clock. Just give me the smell of bacon and coffee.
  • There are risks you take when camping: severe weather, wild animals, someone bringing an acoustic guitar.
  • Remember it’s Christmas. You need to check your elf before you wreck your shelf.
  • I used to party all night. Now I check the weather forecast for the next day to see if it’s a good laundry day.
  • The advantage of being an identical twin: you only need one gym contract.