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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Cancel culture has been canceled.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

I like online shopping and putting everything I want in a cart, then checking my subtotal and laughing and closing the tab.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

I could be a morning person, if morning was sometime around noon.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

It’s so hot, I just saw a squirrel fanning its nuts.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Asking for a cigarette, then adding it to my own pack.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

I threw a ball for my dog. May be a little extravagant, but he looks great in a tux.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Aliens probably lock their doors when they fly past Earth.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

Every time I do something stupid, my dad stares at my mom like he wants a refund.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Ripped a tag off my leggings and did not realize it was load-bearing.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

Nobody at this train station knows that there’s a hole in my sock.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

483 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 15, 2026

Users Online

3,557

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on X:

My son put his dish in the sink so I rushed him to urgent care.

Breaking via Discord:

Please don’t use fear to manipulate me. Much more effective to use cake.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

We just accepted air fryers and never once questioned how air fries things.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

I have more photos of food on my phone than I do of my children.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

I enjoy a glass of wine each night for its health benefits. The other glasses are for my witty comebacks and flawless dance moves.

Making waves on Twitch:

Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier man.

Shared recently on X:

Girl, you gotta try this healing potion. It’s called beer.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Our parents are going to be shocked when they find out that most of us are serious about not getting married.

Making waves on Reddit:

Fog. When nature is too lazy to load the complete environment.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Ironic that the two ơ’s in “cooperate” insist on having their own separate sounds.

Thank you, moon, for staying awake so late.

Humorous quote about the moon's late-night vigilance, capturing a lighthearted celestial vibe.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
The moon's pulling an all-nighter—someone get it some coffee! ☕🌙😴

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Messenger this month:

Do the people who make chairs know what humans look like, or nah?

15 shares on Threads this month:

I just went to Crazy Town, and they said you’re a local legend.

62 shares on TikTok this month:

I’ve reached the conclusion that all men love thigh high stockings.

33 shares on X this month:

A person’s character can be read quite reliably from the way he or she interacts with service personnel.

22 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My least controversial opinion is that IKEA should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a Gjörfbunkle.

81 shares on Facebook this month:

So I just checked my bank account, and it looks like for Christmas I am getting everyone the thought that counts.

16 shares on Threads this month:

The only thing I love more than an open mind is an open bar.

24 shares on Snapchat this month:

You don’t need a therapist, you need an exorcist.

45 shares on Facebook this month:

I hate when I turn off my brights for an incoming vehicle and then realize it’s a Cybertruck.

65 shares on Facebook this month:

At the end of the day, the day is going to end.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Me, first week as a volunteer firefighter thinking we only rescue cats: We’re going where?

5 folks are currently checking 👀

You now have the chance to be the first person to send me nudes.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

When life closes a door, just open it again. It’s a door, that’s how they work.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

When you want to key his car, but he doesn’t have one, so you bend his bus pass.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Toxic girlfriend who goes through her boyfriend’s calculator app and asks why he’s doing the equations he’s doing.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I find that age is just a number, and the older you get, the number you get.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Needlenose in HR says we can’t use nicknames anymore.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate that moment when you are tired and sleepy but as soon as you go to bed your body is like “just kidding.”

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve saved every episode of Hoarders.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Gonna tell my dentist that if I’m late, he should start without me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

483 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 15, 2026

Users Online

3,594

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

Have to wear real clothes on Monday. Pray for me.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

I bought a watermelon and all I can think about is filling it with vodka.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

It really is Monday every 15 minutes.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Never underestimate the healing power of having your bed to yourself.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

When I am calculating any risk, I think to myself: is this first cat life behavior? Or ninth cat life behavior?

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

Livin’ la vida vodka!

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Being friends with introverts is hard sometimes. Did they die? Are they just recharging? Are they Batman now? The suspense is killing me.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

lol is punctuation and LOL is laugh out loud.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Is there a word for FOMO but it’s already happened and you didn’t know about it when it was happening?

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

Pouring rain, football on TV, empty house; the stuff dreams are made of.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Japanese Latina catgirl be like ña.

Breaking via Threads:

I don’t need the web for attention, I jog in a wedding dress.

Spotted on Telegram:

“Left alone” would have been the right answer as a child to the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Maybe Rome was built in a day. I wasn’t there.

Just landed via YouTube:

Why do my fully charged AirPods deplete at different rates? Do I listen harder out of one ear?

Seen just now on Reddit:

Passive income? Brothers, I need massive income.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Christmas is the season of giving, and I’m giving up for good.

Trending via Facebook:

You don’t read Dostoevsky. You survive him.

Seen just now on Facebook:

The problem with “treat yourself” is that I don’t know how to stop. I had a bad day in March, and I’ve been treating myself ever since.

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