Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Women are the ultimate multitaskers – thriving in the art of watching Netflix with subtitles while secretly running the world behind the scenes 📺💁‍♀️ Who says we can't do both? 😉"

entertainment, humor, listen, Netflix, relationship, subtitle, watch, women

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The Princess and the Pea, except it’s a rogue hair on the inside of my shirt driving me crazy all day.

0

2 months ago

annoyance, crazy, day, discomfort, driving, except, hair, humor, inside, me, pea, princess, rogue, shirt
Not to be a nerd, but a well-placed semicolon is hot as hell.

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2 months ago

coding, grammar, hell, hot, humor, language, nerd, punctuation, semicolon, writing
The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

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2 months ago

advice, clue, humor, say, should, uncertainty, urge
Ever thought about centaurs and how the bottom half would start walking immediately after birth but the top part would be baby-like and flop around for a while.

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2 months ago

after, anatomy, animal, around, baby, birth, bottom, centaur, ever, flop, half, humor, imagination, start, thought, top, walking
Authenticity is whispered, but bullshit is broadcasted.

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2 months ago

authenticity, broadcast, bullshit, communication, honesty, irony, whisper
Someone just honked to get me out of my parking spot faster… so now I have to sit here until both of us are dead.

0

1 month ago

both, dead, driving, faster, frustration, here, honk, humor, i, impatience, just, me, parking, parking spot, rage, road, road rage, sit, someone, spot, stubbornness, traffic, us, waiting

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

78 shares on Discord this month:

Home is where you can say anything because nobody’s really listening, anyway.

98 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Your future doctor is using ChatGPT to pass med school so you better start eating healthy.

44 shares on Messenger this month:

All I care about is being financially stable and getting sexier.

39 shares on Threads this month:

Have you tried making guacamole about it?

81 shares on Messenger this month:

Men be like, “I’m sexually attracted to you as a friend.

28 shares on Instagram this month:

Middle children as adults still trying to get attention because the oldest is being dramatic and the younger child is getting away with everything.

16 shares on Instagram this month:

Best tips for saving money: lay down and don’t move.

77 shares on X this month:

They say half the battle of getting in shape is mental, so I thought about the gym really hard today.

59 shares on Discord this month:

Yes, I’ve gained weight. Too many people wanted to have sex with me. It was annoying.

74 shares on WeChat this month:

If you listen closely, you can hear me not caring.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

One day you said w00t for the last time, and didn’t even realize.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Let’s ride this misunderstanding into the sunset.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

Life would be so much easier if the nose of people who lie all the time did actually grow longer like Pinocchio’s.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

I’m like the Temu version of a well-functioning adult.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

A burrito is just a sleeping bag for beans.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Landlord: I’m raising your rent. Me: Am I getting a bigger house?

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

I bet God still calls it Twitter.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

The miracle of DoorDash is that I just pick up my phone, punch a few things into it, and within half an hour I have, at my door, a $52 salad.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Democracy is a fine thing. The bad thing is that the stupid people are allowed to take part.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

“Quit” is not in my vocabulary but “resign”, “drop out”, and “give up” are.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

I may not know what’s going on, but I also have no idea what’s happening.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Me: I love you more than a flower loves the sun. Him: I love you more than a teenager loves his phone.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Being married means mostly shouting “What?” from other rooms.

Breaking via Discord:

Kinda lame that pretending everything is fine isn’t working.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Why can’t people be tested like watermelons? You tap them on the head and find out whether they are normal or bad.

Trending via Slack:

I love hard, but I stupid harder.

Seen just now on Discord:

The people who are $30 trillion in debt are giving you a credit score.

Seen just now on Telegram:

There’s a famous ancient Chinese proverb, but it’s written in Chinese so I have no idea what it says.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Welcome to your 40’s. You now have a favorite vegetable peeler.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Sitting next to you on an empty train and clicking my stopwatch every time you turn a page in your book.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Women watch Netflix with subtitles because they don’t know how to listen.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

The Princess and the Pea, except it’s a rogue hair on the inside of my shirt driving me crazy all day.

Not to be a nerd, but a well-placed semicolon is hot as hell.

The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

Ever thought about centaurs and how the bottom half would start walking immediately after birth but the top part would be baby-like and flop around for a while.

Authenticity is whispered, but bullshit is broadcasted.

Someone just honked to get me out of my parking spot faster… so now I have to sit here until both of us are dead.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨