Commentary:
Who knew "zen" could be spelled with Netflix and chill 📺😌📱
134 Funny watch quotes
Sometimes, when I get emotionally attached to a show, I don’t watch the last episode so it doesn’t end for me.
Commentary:
Refusing to say goodbye like a pro, keeping those fictional friends around indefinitely 📺😭🍿
That time I pulled up 123Movies to watch a movie on my phone and woke up with scheduled porn notifications on my Calendar app for the next 3 years.
Commentary:
Sounds like your phone decided to have its own "adult education" curriculum 📅🍿🔞😂
Watching football with people who don’t usually watch football is an infuriating experience.
Commentary:
Trying to explain the offside rule to a non-football fan is like trying to eat soup with a fork! 🥄🙃🏈
I’m a simple man. If you make me watch extra time, you owe me a penalty shoot-out.
Commentary:
When life gives you extra time, demand penalties! 😂⚽️🥅
You will watch an old classic movie that kind of sucks. Then, on the IMDb trivia, it says, this was the first time a film director ever pointed the camera at the sun.
Commentary:
"Ah yes, the movie where cinematic history meets accidental sunburns! ☀️😂🎬"
I need an Apple Watch that tracks when my patience runs out.
Commentary:
When my patience hits zero, it's time for a snack break! 🍏⏰😄
Ask a man what a good woman is, and watch him describe a slave.
Commentary:
Sounds like someone needs to update their definition app! 😂🕵️♀️🔍
Trying to watch a superhero movie without stressing about the infrastructure damage to the city.
Commentary:
If superhero movies have taught me anything, it's that cities are built exclusively out of Styrofoam! 🌆💥🤣
Sometimes I watch people do their jobs, and I’m like, damn, you might benefit from a little imposter syndrome, actually.
Commentary:
Taking notes for the next office meeting: 1) Develop imposter syndrome, 2) Teach a masterclass on "How Not to Do Your Job" 😂📋💼