Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
  • Not all who wander are lost. Some are just moms. In Target. Hiding from their children.
  • They need to increase life expectancy so I can squeeze in another mid-life crisis.
  • I keep my eyes in great shape by rolling them constantly.
  • There’s something so romantic about getting McDonald’s with a lover. Intimate perhaps.
  • If women came with instructions, men wouldn’t read them anyway.