Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Y’all liking my posts feels like a little forehead kiss.
  • People who can fall asleep quickly freak me out… I mean, don’t they have thoughts?
  • Saw someone from high school. She said she hadn’t seen me in years. That’s likely because I’d always seen her first.
  • Twitter actually is my diary, so you’re not allowed to get mad at the things I post. You’re not even supposed to be reading this. Why were you going through my stuff?
  • Sex is fine, but have you ever completed every single thing on your to-do list?
  • I was going to buy my wife a car for Christmas but then I remembered I don’t live in a commercial.