Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Nothing refreshes my memory of what I need at the grocery store like coming home from the grocery store.
  • Many people mistakenly believe that diamond is the hardest substance on earth, but in reality it is my husband’s stubborn head.
  • I just ordered a life alert bracelet, so if I ever get a life, I’ll be notified immediately.
  • My new pajamas have no pockets. I don’t want to hear your problems.
  • They give smokers all those breaks to make up for the time taken off their lifespan.
  • Never go to bed angry. Stay up and finish the argument like an adult.