Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the sweet spot between diaper duty and teenage drama – embrace it like a champ! 🚼⏳💪 Don't worry, soon enough you'll be reminiscing about the days of diaper changes and sleepless nights. #ParentingAdventures"

baby, diapers, enjoy, enjoyment, humor, life, moments, parenting, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Why does the weekend always feel like it lasts five minutes?

2 months ago

always, feel, feeling, five, humor, lasts, minutes, relatability, time, weekend, why
One day there will be condoms with Bluetooth that tell you whether you’re good in bed, how many calories you’ve burned and when the next train leaves.

2 months ago

bed, Bluetooth, calory, condom, day, fitness, good, humor, innovation, next, relationship, technology, tell, train
Jesus spent his time among the mentally ill, the poor and unemployed, the prostitutes. So, in a way, by being on Twitter, we’re like Jesus.

2 months ago

among, being, comparison, humor, i’ll, irony, Jesus, media, mentally, mentally ill, poor, prostitute, social, social media, spent, time, Twitter, unemployed
“Pre” means before, and “post” means after. Using both at the same time would be preposterous.

2 months ago

after, before, both, definition, humor, language, means, post, pre, preposterous, pun, same, time, wordplay
People tell introverts to talk more and get out of their comfort zone, but no one tells extroverts to shut up to make the zone comfortable.

2 months ago

comfort, comfort zone, comfortable, communication, dynamics, extrovert, humor, introvert, people, personality, personality types, shut, shut up, social, social dynamics, talk, tell, types, zone
Due to inflation, a picture is now worth 2300 words.

2 months ago

economics, humor, inflation, picture, value, words, worth

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

85 shares on Discord this month:

If you wear glasses, we expect a lot from you academically, especially if your glasses have a rope.

36 shares on Twitch this month:

Horrifying if literal: my girlfriend is a gym rat.

75 shares on TikTok this month:

Getting older means talking to less people and complaining about more people.

58 shares on Telegram this month:

Doing taxes for an ant who inherited a teaspoon of sugar.

17 shares on Facebook this month:

Wondering when these skinny jeans are gonna kick in.

14 shares on Twitch this month:

Miso soup is such a silly name, like “Yes, you so soup.”

44 shares on WeChat this month:

I hope this email finds you in a well.

53 shares on TikTok this month:

Don’t worry, nobody noticed the weird thing you did. They’re too busy with the weird thing you said.

55 shares on TikTok this month:

“Be the bigger person” sounds too much like “accept the disrespect”.

83 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Hey, sorry I cant make it tonight. I am beset on all sides by foes.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

I’m never drinking again, unless something is going on later today.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Grocery shopping before Christmas is a nightmare. My milk expired while I was waiting in line.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

I miss being a kid. Nobody asks what my favorite dinosaur is anymore.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

When you decorate your whole house for Christmas, what you’re really saying is “I’m not going to dust for at least a month.”

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

Moms will vacuum the ceiling, alphabetize the spice rack, reorganize your socks, then say, “No one helps me around here!”

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

I like it when it’s raining, because I can hold my umbrella really low and it makes everyone headless.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

The art of today’s art is to persuade people that it’s art.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

I will restart the entire song if you talk over my favorite part.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

If she forgives you, then 30 minutes later comes back mad again: that means she told her friends in her group chat, and the board of directors did not agree.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

Why aren’t we using these t-shirt cannons for burritos?

Shared recently on Discord:

Telling my guitar to “stay tuned”.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Whatever you do today, do it with the confidence of a 4-year old wearing a Batman cape.

Seen just now on Slack:

All the best memories with my dad start with “Don’t tell your mom about this.”

Seen just now on X:

Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

Seen just now on Facebook:

The sexiest woman you know is trying to maintain her balance between insanity and genius.

Spotted on Telegram:

Free will: where you get to choose your own adventure … and regret it.

Breaking via Pinterest:

You should be allowed to call out of work if you have a really bad nightmare.

Just shared via TikTok:

Growing up means choosing cozy couch moments over crowded club scenes. Cheers to adulting!

Spreading quickly via X:

No place in this world is as dark as my archived chats on WhatsApp.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Enjoy the time between diapers!

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Why does the weekend always feel like it lasts five minutes?

One day there will be condoms with Bluetooth that tell you whether you’re good in bed, how many calories you’ve burned and when the next train leaves.

Jesus spent his time among the mentally ill, the poor and unemployed, the prostitutes. So, in a way, by being on Twitter, we’re like Jesus.

“Pre” means before, and “post” means after. Using both at the same time would be preposterous.

People tell introverts to talk more and get out of their comfort zone, but no one tells extroverts to shut up to make the zone comfortable.

Due to inflation, a picture is now worth 2300 words.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨