14 Funny butter quotes

• Salted, and I cannot stress this enough, butter.

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  5 days ago

  butter, cooking, emphasis, enough, food, food preference, humor, i, preference, salted, salted butter, seasoning, stress

• I’ve discovered that my visiting family members leave crumbs in the butter. Please keep me in your thoughts during this difficult time.

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  2 months ago

  butter, complaint, crumb, crumbs, difficult, difficult time, family, humor, keep, leave, me, please, thoughts, time, visiting, visitor

• There should be a true crime story about feeding someone a peanut butter sandwich and giving them nothing to drink.

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  2 months ago

  absurdity, butter, crime, drink, feeding, food, funny scenario, giving, humor, joke, nothing, peanut, peanut butter, prank, sandwich, scenario, should, someone, story, thirst, true

• Distance is my jam; solitude is my peanut butter.

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  2 months ago

  butter, comedy, distance, humor, introvert, jam, loneliness, peanut, peanut butter, personal, personal space, solitude, space

• I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

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  2 months ago

  butter, care, counting, data, eaten, English, English muffin, food, humor, i, life, muffin, peanut, peanut butter, personal, personal data, screen, stats, things, wish

• I avoid clarified butter because I prefer my dairy products to be troubled and confused.

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  2 months ago

  butter, confused, dairy, food, humor, preference, troubled

• A spoonful of peanut butter from the jar will fix me.

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  2 months ago

  butter, comfort, comfort food, fix, food, humor, jar, me, peanut, peanut butter, snack, spoonful

• The person who invented butter really understood humans.

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  2 months ago

  butter, food, humans, humor, invention, person, understanding

• Avocado is just green butter.

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  2 months ago

  avocado, butter, comparison, culinary, culinary joke, fat, food, food comparison, food humor, green, healthy, healthy fat, humor, joke, just

• Why is there a level 6 for toasters? As if someone thinks: “Tonight I’m really in the mood for ashes with butter!”

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  2 months ago

  6, absurdity, butter, cooking, food, humor, level, level 6, mood, someone, toaster, tonight

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