Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Who needs resolutions and commandments when you've got charm and wit? 😏 It's all about living on the edge and breaking the rules with style! 😜🔥 #RebelWithACause"

broken, commandments, failure, humor, irony, Resolutions, self-reflection

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The rain is pouring. So naturally it’s a good day to eat 6 donuts.

0

2 months ago

day, donuts, eat, food, good, good day, humor, indulgence, naturally, rain, treat, weather
I’m not getting fatter. I’m increasing my content.

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2 months ago

body, body image, content, fat, getting, humor, image, perspective, self-deprecation
Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

0

2 months ago

activity, climbing, describe, flat, hike, humor, just, mountain, outdoors, someone
Sometimes my mouth hits send before my brain has a chance to stop it.

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2 months ago

before, brain, chance, communication, humor, mistake, mouth, send, sometimes, stop, technology, texting
How do I tell Instagram I don’t want to see guys almost eaten by gators?

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2 months ago

gator, guys, humor, i, Instagram, media, preferences, social, social media, tell, want, wildlife
My dental plan is, “I guess I’ll just chew on this side of my mouth from now on.”

0

2 months ago

care, chew, dental, dental care, dental plan, guess, humor, i, joke, just, mouth, plan, side

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on WeChat this month:

Sex before marriage is a sin unless you do it doggy style, because all dogs go to heaven. Follow me for more biblical loopholes.

84 shares on Slack this month:

“Well, this is no good. How do I turn it off?” – The first primate to experience consciousness.

68 shares on Messenger this month:

The problem with people starts when we expect things from them, or have anything to do with them.

58 shares on TikTok this month:

“It’s bikini season,” I whisper, eating another bikini.

36 shares on Telegram this month:

If I walk into a girl’s house and she got like 50 plants, I know she’s a keeper because she already takes care of a bunch of useless things. What’s one more?

66 shares on Pinterest this month:

Everyone focused on the lip filler, but it’s really the chin filler that is the real villain.

74 shares on Slack this month:

Dear life, when I said “can this day get any worse” it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.

73 shares on Slack this month:

The note on this boxed wine says ‘Fresh up to 6 weeks after opening’. 6 weeks. Lol.

18 shares on X this month:

It may sound crazy but some of us are nice without hidden agendas.

49 shares on Instagram this month:

Jingle all the way? In this economy?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

Doing all of this just to die in the end! LMAO!

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Automated phone system: To speak to a representative, please enter the first twelve digits of pi.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Banks: You are broke, so we are going to charge you for being broke.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

You are my favorite dirty thought.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

I want him in ways that are deeply deeply upsetting to modern feminism.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Another day of waking up cute instead of wealthy, so I guess I have to go to work.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

I always preferred the English spelling of “diarrhea” which is “diarrhoea” because it really looks like you’ve lost control of your vowels.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

I just love the lack of privacy in the pharmacy line. Just standing there shouting out my name, date of birth, and exactly what is wrong with me for the world to hear.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

A late person is never happier than when the person they’re meeting is later than them.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

Making waves on Slack:

I’ve realized that some people don’t like me, but I’ve also realized that I don’t give a shit.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I like people who can admit their mistakes and apologize. In other words, I like very few people.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I caught two kids smoking pot outside my office. Fifteen minutes later, my boss caught me and two kids smoking pot outside my office.

Just shared via YouTube:

The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Don’t interrupt me while I’m embarrassing myself.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Nothing prepared me for the part of adulthood where you look like a baby deer learning to walk every time you get out of bed in the morning.

Going bananas on Discord:

Men are like dogs. They’re actually cute, but having my own would be too much work for me.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

The cool thing about Twitter is you’re never the craziest one.

Making waves on Instagram:

I dunno what I did in a past life but holy crap I’m sorry.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’ve already broken all my resolutions and like four commandments.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

The rain is pouring. So naturally it’s a good day to eat 6 donuts.

I’m not getting fatter. I’m increasing my content.

Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

Sometimes my mouth hits send before my brain has a chance to stop it.

How do I tell Instagram I don’t want to see guys almost eaten by gators?

My dental plan is, “I guess I’ll just chew on this side of my mouth from now on.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨