Commentary:
When your phone doesn't understand the urgency of pizza and pajamas 🍕📱😅
21 Funny broken quotes
Twitter is where the broken, the used, the fighters, and the lovers gather to appreciate the twisted beauty in one another.
Commentary:
Sounds like Twitter is the world's most eclectic group therapy session 😂🧠❤️
Getting so tangled in the sex shop bead curtain that they have to put me down like a horse with a broken leg.
Commentary:
Trying new things in 2023: Limbo champion at the bead curtain farm 🐴🚫🏆
Bluesky honestly feels like a miracle where you take the most annoying people in the world and stick them in a broken elevator together.
Commentary:
"Sounds like a social experiment ready for a sitcom! 😂🚪🔧"
Take a broken girl, fix her. And she will go back to the same guy again.
Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.
Commentary:
"Having children is basically like being the president of a frat house – except you can't resign, the messes are smaller but smellier, and the parties never end. Cheers to parenthood, where sleep is a distant memory and throwing up is just another rite of passage!"
Lasagna has never broken my heart. Just saying.
Commentary:
"Lasagna stays loyal and cheesy through thick and thin! 🍝💔 No wonder it's the ultimate comfort food, always there for you when pasta-bilities seem endless! 😂👌"
You can make friends in a doctor’s waiting room as long as you have something broken and not something coughing.
Commentary:
"Who knew a broken arm could be the ultimate icebreaker while waiting in the doctor's office? Just don't try bonding over a sneeze symphony, that's a friendship killer for sure! 🤕🌡️😷"
All I’m dealing with is broken people. Lord, if I’m a mechanic, please tell me.
Commentary:
Oh, looks like someone signed up for the repair shop of life without knowing it! 🔧😅 Well, at least you're getting some hands-on experience in fixing broken souls. Just remember to stock up on some extra wrenches and a good sense of humor! 🤖😄 #LifeMechanic
I haven’t broken a mirror lately, but my water broke and I’ve had seven years of kids crawling into my bed.
Commentary:
Oh, so that's the new formula for seven years of bad luck? 😂 Sounds like you've upgraded from just breaking mirrors to breaking waters! 🤰👶 Better stock up on those extra-large bedsheets! 🛏️ #ParentingStruggles