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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

If you’re a guy and you’re struggling right now, just remember nobody cares, and it does get worse.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

According to my calculations, we’re all screwed.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

My bad if I ever left you on read. I didn’t mean to open the message.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

Twitter account so good even HR wants to see it.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

Nothing can break the bond between me and peanut butter.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Everyone’s a gangster until their doorbell rings.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

If all men are the same, why does it take women so long to choose one?

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

Being a sleepy girl with a busy life is so hard.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

The amount I’m sighing these days could fuel a small wind farm.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,607

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Twitch:

I disagree with my politics.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Let the good times roll. Let the bad times crawl. Let the acceptable times do the hopscotch.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Teens be like, “I wanted to do that until you asked me to.”

Breaking via Twitch:

It triggers the little girl in me when I feel like I’m not being listened to when I’m talking.

Just landed via Threads:

I’ve been following this strict diet all week and so far all I’ve lost is my patience.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I put on my Godzilla costume, then go to the miniature golf course to beat up the windmill.

Just landed via Slack:

Shy with a mean resting face is a crazy combo.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

One thing I miss about the pandemic is getting to rip my mask off like I just botched a surgery.

Going viral on X:

Delightful if true: booby trap.

Trending via Instagram:

Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.

Men shouldn’t be allowed to download any app other than Wikipedia.

0
Men shouldn’t be allowed to download any app other than Wikipedia.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Imagine a world where men could only swipe right on knowledge! 📚💡 No more endless scrolling through mindless apps, just endless learning opportunities. 🧠👨‍💻 Who needs dating apps when you have the wisdom of the world at your fingertips? 😂❤️ #KnowledgeIsPower"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on Slack this month:

Sex is like tacos. I wish I were having some now.

76 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m liking your IG photo from 8 days ago because IG just showed me today!

11 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Probably the most humiliating thing that can happen when you die is that you come back as a fitted-sheet ghost.

84 shares on Slack this month:

Life is not a fairy tale. If you lose your shoe at midnight, you’re drunk.

97 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Does everyone in the world want to come to my house tomorrow?

79 shares on Discord this month:

My goal in life is to not have to commit seppuku.

90 shares on Twitch this month:

I have nothing in common with people who “forget to eat”.

17 shares on Messenger this month:

When the exam is so hard that you look out the window to appreciate nature.

17 shares on Pinterest this month:

Do you ever think about how many people squeezed the avocado that you’re eating?

61 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m officially at the age where I hate unnecessary noises and useless friends.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Thursday is really unnecessary. Today could’ve been Friday.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

An Advent Calendar for adults but behind every door is a different kind of anxiety medication.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I want Wolverine claws. Not for violence or anything. I want them for easing my way through reality. Like opening an Amazon package.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

The most attractive thing a man can do is hitting his own head and repeating “stupid, stupid, stupid”.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

That’s me in the corner, that’s me using Microsoft Word, losing my revision.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t need to grow a thick skin. The world needs to grow fewer thorns.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Since the beginning of time itself, people have been wondering, what the hell is going on?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Jobs are so clingy. Why do you need to see me 40 hours a week?

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I would be very interested to hear from someone who is ILLEGALLY blind.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I was born to be wild, but only until around 9pm or so.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,500

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

More candlelight, less gaslight, babe.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

I got my superpowers when I was bitten by a radioactive idiot.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

That gap between Christmas and New Year’s when you can’t tell what day of the week it is.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

Getting your hair washed by someone else is one of life’s greatest joys no one really speaks about often.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

I hate when someone you love says mean things like, “It’s time to wake up.”

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

The house from Hansel and Gretel but made out of tacos.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Dance like nobody’s watching, except God, the NSA, and Santa Claus.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

I’m sorry, but when you call me ‘batshit crazy’ it’s almost starting to sound like you think it’s a bad thing!

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

Introverts be like “I know a place”, then go home.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

1pm, the perfect time to start doing the work I woke up early to get a jump on.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I will never forget how to spell bananas, thanks to Gwen Stefani.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

The fact that I have more clothes to sleep in than I do to go out in says a lot about who I am as a person.

Live now on Facebook:

Anyone who thinks office jobs are harmless has never cut their finger on paper.

Going viral on Messenger:

Might lay here until someone draws my chalk outline.

Trending via WhatsApp:

The best part about having a crush is when they crush all your hopes and dreams.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I love people who refuse to follow the crowd. The crowd is always lost, follow your inner compass.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Marriage tip: If your wife goes silent in the middle of an argument, you probably shouldn’t ask if you can go back to mowing the lawn.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

You are allowed to be crazy as long as you are equally as hot.

Trending via YouTube:

These people act like they’ve never seen anyone wearing a Speedo in a laundromat before.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

When someone asks why you don’t have kids just say “dingoes”.

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