My doubters will become my grouters when I remodel the bathroom of success.

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If you think one of my posts is about you, it isn’t. Except this one.

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A plus of getting older is not having to make as much small talk because half the conversation is spent asking the other person to repeat what they just said.

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At the job interview with one AirPod in.

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Most earthquakes could have been an email.

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I don’t drink coffee all the time. I take breaks in between to make another one.

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Job interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: I would say my biggest weakness is listening.

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I’m not totally useless. I can be used as a bad example.

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How many of y’all are “burn a CD” and “lime wire” old?

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My first mistake was leaving the womb.

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Sunday night: Super Bowl party! Monday morning: Toilet Bowl party!