Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

70% of the planet is covered in water, yet here I am drowning in bullshit.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

Sundays are no place for pants or responsibility.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I told my GPS I needed direction in life, and now it insists on recalculating every hour.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Remember when we had to smack the TV cause it wasn’t coming in clearly? I feel that way about too many people.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Before I work on myself, does anyone like me unhinged?

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

I’m really looking forward to getting a full 8 hours of overthinking in tonight.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

What makes us human is selecting all images with traffic lights.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Is it just me or does everything cost like we’re shopping in an airport now?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,458

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Reddit:

After having received my free sample of winter, I would like to cancel my subscription please.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I’ve folded seven page corners of the book I’m reading. That’s 49 in dog ears.

Just landed via Discord:

Netflix will help you finish the name of the movie you’re typing, and then tell you they don’t have it.

Making waves on Reddit:

There I was, quietly reliving my dream of having my own house, when suddenly I was attacked by insane prices.

Trending via X:

(to the boys in the yard) I hope you brought your own milkshake.

Seen just now on Twitch:

We’re all naughty, some just more than others.

Trending via Facebook:

Taking Adderall before going to lay on the beach so I can focus more on having a good time.

Breaking via YouTube:

Today is the Mondayest Thursday that has ever been mistaken for a Friday in the history of Wednesdays.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Texas Chain Saw Massacre is full of plot holes. What happens to the victims when they die? Is there an afterlife?

Shared recently on Threads:

Don’t scare me, I fart easily.

My passport probably thinks I’m in prison.

Humorous text about travel frustration, suggesting the passport's mistaken imprisonment perception.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Oh, the adventures my passport was expecting… only to end up confined within the walls of boredom and routine! 🌏🛂 #PassportProbz #LockedUpButNotLockedDown"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

36 shares on Slack this month:

I’m sorry I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.

27 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I just want someone who can see through all my bullshit and hate me for who I really am.

21 shares on WeChat this month:

“Be the bigger person” sounds too much like “accept the disrespect”.

80 shares on Discord this month:

More foods should have boats, why should gravy have all the fun?

17 shares on Threads this month:

We used to burn CDs like we were running an underground record label.

68 shares on WeChat this month:

I could never work in an aquarium. I would have a penguin under my shirt at the end of the shift.

84 shares on TikTok this month:

If I could have immunity to anything I would pick calories.

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

Explain it to me like I’m 5 drinks in.

19 shares on Snapchat this month:

Shout out to the people getting $400 hotel rooms on Feb 14th to do the same two positions they do at home.

69 shares on Slack this month:

Once again I feel like I slept in a washing machine.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a sore throat as a giraffe must really suck.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m drinking coffee so I don’t say mean things to you. You’re welcome.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Being quiet in a room full of loud people is my favorite sport.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish tree puns were more poplar.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

From now on, every time I think I’m hating too much, I will think of Kendrick and realize I’m not hating to my full potential.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The only ‘survival horror’ game I play is called ‘getting up every day and leaving the house.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I wonder if BBQ thinks about me too.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

The one thing I think most parents need to realize is, there’s absolutely no secrets that your child doesn’t share about you in the classroom.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I need a horror movie where a kidnapper abducts a possessed child and finds out.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,541

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

I’m not alone. I have ants.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

A fitness trainer showed me the proper way to inhale and exhale and then got pissed when I told her she had nice breaths.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

A social media post so confusing you turn your music down to read it.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

No more looking back in anger. It’s time to look forward in anger.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Every triangle is a love triangle when you love triangles.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

I’m surprised some of you are allowed out of your house on your own.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

What bootlickers fail to understand is that the boot eventually comes for them too.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

Quitting my job to focus more on my desire not to work anymore.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

My boyfriend always complains that I never smile, but he’s the one who wanted a serious relationship.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

I just start doing the Macarena when I want to end conversations now.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

When intelligence meets empathy and kindness, it’s so sexy.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Everyone has that one friend they’ve known for years and still have no idea what they actually do for a living, but it’s too late to ask.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I was in Paris with a boyfriend once and he lit a candle in Notre Dame in order to ask God to raise the price of Bitcoin.

Shared recently on Slack:

Asking a film guy, “Who is that?” when Tom Cruise comes on screen just to feel something.

Trending via Instagram:

I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it.

Live now on Pinterest:

Next to nothing is a weird place.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Boss: Why do I have to always come and find you? Me: Because a good employee is hard to find.

Just shared via WeChat:

You are not in a situationship. You are texting a man who doesn’t like you.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Turns out the honeymoon phase lasts forever when you pick the right partner.

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