Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the power of words – who knew a paragraph had the magic touch to improve relationships? 📜✨ Maybe I should start sending essays to get that VIP treatment! 😂 #RelationshipGoals"

belief, better, communication, delusion, expectations, humor, paragraph, relationships, someone, treat

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I love beating a dead horse with the girls. There is nothing better than a Saturday night rehashing, and never letting that horse rest in peace.

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4 months ago

beating, better, conversation, dead, dead horse, friendship, girl, girls, horse, humor, i, letting, love, never, night, nothing, peace, rehash, rest, Saturday, Saturday night
Toddlers: I’ve licked everything so everything is mine now.

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2 months ago

childhood, everything, humor, lick, mess, ownership, play, toddler
Unfortunately, free coffee in the office will never hit like a $9 iced latte will.

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2 months ago

9, coffee, comparison, expense, free, hit, humor, iced, iced latte, latte, luxury, never, office, preference, unfortunately
My wife screamed “you haven’t listened to a single word I’ve said, have you?!” I was taken aback, what a weird way to start a conversation.

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2 months ago

communication, conversation, humor, i, listen, misunderstanding, relationship, single, start, surprise, taken, weird, wife, word
I look so pretty today. I should go for a walk and let the people enjoy this.

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2 months ago

appearance, confidence, enjoy, enjoyment, humor, i, let, outdoors, people, pretty, self-love, should, today, walk
Staying weird for my own sanity.

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2 months ago

humor, individuality, own, sanity, self-expression, staying, weird

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on Twitch this month:

Haggis – the meal you have to stomach twice.

29 shares on Twitch this month:

I’ll let you guys know if the psych ward has wifi.

77 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Can’t, trying to piece together today’s news from social media posts.

57 shares on YouTube this month:

Welcome to your 40’s: you have big plans tonight. No, you don’t.

48 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I don’t understand all the fuss about ChatGPT – I have teenagers who already know everything.

89 shares on Pinterest this month:

Haunted house idea: a poorly lit Walmart littered with people you haven’t seen since high school.

24 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It’s not ‘drinking alone’ if you’re at work.

71 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I hate being in that mood where nothing’s really wrong but nothing feels right either.

42 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m not deleting my Twitter, I was here before Elon.

30 shares on Pinterest this month:

Sunday is my favorite day to invent new things to worry about.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

“We should get tickets” is as close to a rock concert as I get these days.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Gardeners are the only people who willingly go outside to get dirty, sweaty, bitten, and sunburned… and call it “relaxing”.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

There’s not gonna be a civil war. None of us can afford to take that much time off work.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

If you think my posts are ridiculous, you should see some of my life choices.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Yeah, sex is great, but have you ever checked your bank account and had way more money than you expected.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Family fistfights brought to you by Monopoly.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

I used to be a person who couldn’t easily fall asleep, then I got divorced and now I sleep like a baby. Probably unrelated.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

I could have done without braces back then. What’s the point of having perfect teeth if I have no reason to smile?

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Hey (threateningly), can I join your years-old, tight-knit, close friend group?

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

I’ve decided to give people an attitude instead of gifts this year.

Breaking via Twitch:

When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they’re not it.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Adult life sucks. Friends don’t even ask to see how fast you can run in your new shoes anymore.

Spotted on Discord:

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I do not know how to put this gently, but part of being a good driver is using the gas and brake as little as humanly possible.

Just landed via Slack:

Stop expecting people to be as cool as you, it’s a recipe for disappointment.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Aura is the real business card.

Making waves on Pinterest:

The Secret Service was chasing me but I painted a tunnel on the side of a wall and they all ran into it.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Socks try to be monogamous, but most end up either single or having multiple different partners.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Sleeping in now means waking up without the alarm clock, but still at the same time.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Peak delusion is believing that a paragraph will make someone treat you better.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I love beating a dead horse with the girls. There is nothing better than a Saturday night rehashing, and never letting that horse rest in peace.

Toddlers: I’ve licked everything so everything is mine now.

Unfortunately, free coffee in the office will never hit like a $9 iced latte will.

My wife screamed “you haven’t listened to a single word I’ve said, have you?!” I was taken aback, what a weird way to start a conversation.

I look so pretty today. I should go for a walk and let the people enjoy this.

Staying weird for my own sanity.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨