Commentary:
When I asked for a day when I'd actually get things done, I was really hoping for two days from now 😅🌟
197 Funny better quotes
We need a lengthy German word for that sinking sensation when, at lunch with a friend, you see that your friend has ordered a much better lunch than you did.
Commentary:
Lunch envy: the wurst kind of betrayal! 🌭😩🍽️
Never underestimate the ability of ice cream to make you feel better when you’re having a bad day as an adult.
Commentary:
Why go to therapy when you can just grab a pint? 🍦🛋️😄
Crushes are meant for motivation to do better, not to actively pursue.
Commentary:
Sounds like the workout plan my heart didn't sign up for! 💪💖😂
Sometimes I think the subway rat is doing better than me. He has a routine, a social circle, and knows where to find the best pizza.
Commentary:
Why do I feel like that rat has its life more together than I do? 🍕🐀🏆
No matter how sad you are, there is some form of potato that can make it better.
Commentary:
Potatoes: the root of all joy and the spudtacular cure for sadness! 🥔😂
I know Jesus was a carpenter, but I think he would’ve been a better plumber, you know, with the water thing.
Commentary:
He’d definitely have the pipes singing hallelujah! 🚰😄🙏
Y’all ever postpone an outfit? Like, nah, let me save this for a better day? Same.
Commentary:
When your outfit is too fire for a Monday and needs to marinate until Saturday 🔥😎✨
If David Bowie taught us anything, it’s that being a little weird is better than being forgettable.
Commentary:
Channeling my inner Bowie… I'm off to buy more glitter and a pet iguana just to keep things interesting! ✨🦎
“I’ve had cigarettes that were better than entire years of my life.”
Commentary:
Sounds like your future memoir title should be "2020: The Year That Really Needed a Cigarette Break" 🚬😂📅