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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

I asked myself if I was toxic and we said no.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

If there is a God and He “loves” us, then explain snakes.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Real introverts are too introverted to tell people they’re introverts.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

There are no laws against pineapples on pizza.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

In a massage chair at the mall just moaning really loud.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $1 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst anniversary gifts ever.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

Please go out, have fun, have friends, make connections. That mysterious lifestyle won’t save you.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Money does not buy happiness, but it’s better to cry in a sports car than on a bicycle.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

296 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,565

Funny Quotes Topics

17,623

Funny Quotes Images

15,565

Jan 11, 2026

3,566

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

One thing I love about the internet is seeing some of the most hateful people posting inspirational quotes.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Here’s a fun activity you can do with your kids on rainy days when they have too much energy: Go shopping and leave them at home with their dad.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Quitting my job to focus more on my desire not to work anymore.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I think airplanes would be way cooler if the wings flapped like a bird.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

There are so many people going to hell. I’m thinking of investing in some property there.

Live now on Reddit:

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Praying to God with a Chinese accent, and he is cracking up.

Making waves on X:

If you can’t wow them with wisdom, baffle them with bullshit.

Making waves on Telegram:

Alexa, play everyone that played me.

Just shared via Twitch:

Do cats have a sense of causation between grooming themselves and coughing up hairballs, or do they think it’s just an annoying separate thing which just happens to them sometimes?

We all just kind of accept it as normal that we have a meat tentacle living inside of our mouth.

3 months ago

We all just kind of accept it as normal that we have a meat tentacle living inside of our mouth.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Isn't it bizarre how we nonchalantly house a meaty tentacle in our mouths? 🦑 It's like having a strange, unsuspecting roommate who loves to taste-test everything before we do. 🤪 Maybe we should throw a tiny welcome party for our tongue next time! 🎉 #MeatTentacleLife"

absurdity, acceptance, humor, inside, just, living, meat, mouth, normal, tentacle

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

There are two wolves inside me, but please no one tell my landlord.

2 months ago

duality, humor, inner, inner struggle, inside, joke, landlord, me, struggle, tell, wolf
I’ve got 99 problems. I know this because I wake up in the middle of the night to review each and every one of them in great detail.

6 months ago

anxiety, detail, every, got, great, humor, i, insomnia, know, middle, night, overthinking, problem, problems, review, sleep, wake, worry
Establish dominance by showing up with all your childhood trophies.

2 months ago

achievement, childhood, childhood trophy, confidence, dominance, humor, nostalgia, playfulness, trophy
Putting mental health before my education is a good idea until it affects my education, which affects my mental health, which affects my education.

2 months ago

balance, before, care, cycle, education, good, health, humor, idea, life, mental, mental cycle, mental health, putting, self, self-care, stress, student, student life
I’m not climbing a hill if I’m dying. That sounds terrible. I’ll die on this chair. Drinking orange Fanta.

2 months ago

chair, climbing, die, drink, drinking, dying, Fanta, hill, humor, laziness, orange, relaxation, sounds, terrible
I get it, funds… I, too, am insufficient.

4 months ago

am, financial, financial struggle, fund, funds, humor, i, insufficiency, money, pun, struggle, too, wordplay

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on Snapchat this month:

Stay humble and play dumb. People reveal who they truly are when they think they are smarter than you.

42 shares on Snapchat this month:

“What fresh hell is this?“ It’s actually the same hell as yesterday. Not fresh at all, really.

95 shares on Slack this month:

I’m an over-explainer (I explain things too much).

14 shares on Reddit this month:

‘I have a ripe avocado at home’ is my favorite excuse for cancelling plans.

64 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m gonna start cursing people out but with biblical phrases like I hope your crops wither and bear no fruit and the ravens eat your mustard seeds.

46 shares on WeChat this month:

From now on, every time I think I’m hating too much, I will think of Kendrick and realize I’m not hating to my full potential.

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

They are all liars, so just pick the tallest and enjoy.

89 shares on Pinterest this month:

You guys know your secrets are safe with me. It’s the people I share them with you can’t trust.

69 shares on Slack this month:

Always keep a dog eared book on your nightstand so that people think you know how to read.

12 shares on TikTok this month:

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. It can’t just be the one guy. It’s gotta be a group of people pooping my son’s diaper.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Your password must contain a character… with a tragic backstory.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

When I finally snap it’ll be because I had to type my email address in on the TV.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t even have to date, by the way. You can just take a break from love and then randomly meet the actual love of your life somewhere you weren’t even supposed to be.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

It must be hard having an erectile dysfunction.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I have an addiction to pattern recognition.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m surviving motherhood, one teenage meltdown at a time.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

No, thanks—social drama. Puberty sucked enough the first time around.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Can’t say “I’m tired” without my mom making it a competition of who is the most tired and who has more reason to be.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

My OnlyFans is just hours of me untangling Christmas lights.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

A long time ago, being crazy meant something. Nowadays, everybody is crazy.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

296 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,565

Funny Quotes Topics

17,623

Funny Quotes Images

15,565

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,329

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life or are living it to the fullest.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

Killing with kindness is a murder by compliments.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

We have decided to sell the house. How long do you think it will take for our landlord to find out?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

As a student, the most comforting words you’ll ever hear are “I haven’t started either.”

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

My superpower is to make anyone I wanna make comfortable feel uncomfortable.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

God, never seen San Francisco this bad. Spiderwebs completely covering entire business, skeletons just strewn about sidewalks in every neighborhood. Things have got to change!

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

You call it nagging, I call it ‘listen to what I said the first time!’

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Ask a man what a good woman is, and watch him describe a slave.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Man, you really don’t appreciate not having something in your eye until you have something in your eye.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

There are risks you take when camping: severe weather, wild animals, someone bringing an acoustic guitar.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on X:

Feels like if cicadas are allowed to just sit in a tree and scream, I should also be.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

99% of celebrating your birthday as an adult just consists of texting back “thanks so much”.

Breaking via Snapchat:

The worst thing about being an adult is that you have to be one every single day.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Waiting patiently for the alien invasion.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Math is like Chinese to me.

Spotted on Telegram:

The amount of family secrets you uncover as you get older is wild.

Just shared via YouTube:

FOMO? No, I’ve got FOBI. Fear of being invited.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I would really like to meet this “other candidate” who keeps taking all the jobs I’ve been applying to.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Of course the laundry has to be done, but the wine doesn’t drink itself either.

Breaking via YouTube:

Ever since I was young, I knew I wanted to be online nonstop.

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