Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • This year felt like being awake during surgery.
  • My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.
  • Christmas is the season of giving, and I’m giving up for good.
  • It’s not too early to go to sleep. Too early only applies to waking up.
  • At 20, I was unstoppable; at 30, I’m just unstartable.
  • My heart says, chocolate and wine, but my jeans say “Woman, are you kidding? Eat a salad!”