And once again my day begins without a red carpet! Guys, I’m really disappointed in you.

And once again my day begins without a red carpet! Guys, I'm really disappointed in you.

Commentary:
“Oh, the audacity of a day starting without a red carpet! 🙄 Clearly, the paparazzi missed the memo! Better luck tomorrow, superstar! ⭐️📸 #AListProblems”

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • In the 90s, you could tell who won the rap battle by who was still alive.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the good ol’ 90s rap battles: where survival was the ultimate flex! 💥💀 Let’s just say, winning those battles was a real ‘life or death’ situation back then! 😂🎤 #RapBattleRoyale”

  • Halloween candy isn’t bad for you if you keep it in a salad bowl.

    Commentary:
    “Whoever said you can’t have your candy and eat it too clearly never heard of the Halloween salad bowl diet! It’s all about balance… and a little bit of trick-or-treating magic.”

  • Obituaries should have clickbait titles.

    Commentary:
    “Say goodbye to boring obituaries! Introducing the latest trend: Clickbait titles for the afterlife. ‘You won’t believe what this person did in their final moments!’ 🤣💀 #RestInClickbait #GoneViral”

  • Why would I want a memory pillow? Sleep is where I go to forget.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs a memory pillow when sleep is the ultimate ‘forget me not’ zone? 💤🤔 Sweet dreams of selective memory ahead! 😆”

  • I don’t understand the desire to rock climb. We have stairs for that now. Problem solved.

    Commentary:
    Oh, the evolution of human laziness! Why break a sweat outdoors when you can conquer the almighty staircase in all its glory? 🧗‍♂️ Who needs the thrill of clinging to a cliff when you can bravely tackle the treacherous journey from the first floor to the second… and maybe even the third if you’re feeling extra adventurous? 😂 Just remember, the real challenge isn’t the climb itself but trying to look cool while doing it with your office bag

  • The Secret Service was chasing me but I painted a tunnel on the side of a wall and they all ran into it.

    Commentary:
    Looks like someone’s been taking tips from the one and only Road Runner 🏃‍♂️🎨🚙! Nothing like a little creativity to outsmart the Secret Service, eh? Just be careful not to drop any anvils on their heads next time 😉💥.