Trending Funny Quotes πŸ‘‡

  • If you steal enough FitBits, they’ll just give you one for your ankle.
  • I’m a yapper. I’m a napper. I’m a midnight snacker.
  • When I put on weight, it’s around my stomach. When I lose weight, it’s around my legs. I’m not a structural engineer, but that can’t be good.
  • β€œI’m sure it’ll turn up” – Translation: I’m bored of helping you look.
  • Tonight, my poor liver has to pay again for what went wrong during the week.
  • If I’m not spoken to, my morning grumpiness goes almost unnoticed.