I’m doing well at accomplishing nothing today and I’m very proud of myself.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

The Bloodhound Gang were very special because its music for 12-year-old boys, but every reference requires you to be 40 years old.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Of course your crush is going to leave their spouse for you. That’s how delusions work.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

I’d probably be a very chill werewolf, even during a full moon.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

This heat made me realize I won’t survive in hell, I gotta change.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Printers and computers treat each other like they broke up the night before, and you’re their mutual friend.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

The difference between coffee and your opinion is that I asked for coffee.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

It really is Monday every 15 minutes.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

All the observable evidence suggests that, if I was much worse at my job, I’d be more likely to get a promotion to senior management.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

When you want to key his car, but he doesn’t have one, so you bend his bus pass.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

I was at the cemetery when a little kid walked up to me and said she was afraid. I took her hand and told her that I used to be afraid too… when I was alive.