Trending Funny Quotes πŸ‘‡

  • Vote for me, I’ll cut the alphabet in half.
  • I replaced my old flat pillow that hurt my neck with a new fat fluffy pillow that hurts my neck.
  • The feelings I have for Tom Cruise are the closest approximation I have to what patriotism must feel like.
  • My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I’m still at work.
  • If I was a star and you were a star, I would wink at you and blink at you and twinkle at you and the earthlings would call it science.
  • Back to work at last! I couldn’t sleep for sheer anticipation.