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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

I love how this generation broke the previous misconception that “people with tattoos can’t get good jobs” and now we all agree that “people with and without tattoos can’t get good jobs”.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Aura farming in front of old people by not listening to music nor checking my phone.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

I’m actually quite nice. If I had friends, they’d all confirm that.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

Why is bacon called bacon and cookies called cookies if you cook bacon and bake cookies?

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

I miss my Dad opening the windows and talking about cross-ventilation.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

I like the concept of restaurant appetizers: “Bring me something to eat. And bring me something else to eat while I’m waiting.”

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Enjoy the time between diapers!

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

It’s perfectly normal if you want to watch an actor’s entire filmography because you find them attractive. Don’t let anyone stop you.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

Watching true crime documentaries so I can learn from their mistakes.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

If you encounter a teenager out in the wild, be kind. They are the first generation of kids whose parents are cooler than they are.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

234 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,503

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,503

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,606

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Every Jurassic Park movie should end with an insurance adjuster getting a phone call and immediately throwing up.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Forget being the bigger person, I’m going to just start barking at people.

Shared recently on Slack:

I’m a total go with the flow kinda person as long as the flow is meticulously scheduled well in advance and there are no mid-flow changes whatsoever.

Trending via Snapchat:

Your honor, my client doesn’t like jail.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Coworker: Hey, circling back on that thing we talked about in December. Me: Stop living in the past!

Going bananas on Facebook:

How lazy are you?” I greet people by raising my eyebrows.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Just landed via YouTube:

Dear nurses, you don’t have to announce my weight, just write it down. That’s why I have my eyes closed when I’m on the scale.

Just shared via Messenger:

Well, it took several decades, but I might have finally run out of things to say.

Trending via Messenger:

If you’ve never had a cheeseburger change your mood, you’ve never had a cheeseburger.

Be the nonsense you wish to see in the world.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Bringing my A-game today: Absurdity level 💯! 🤪✨ #LivingTheNonsenseLife"

creativity, humor, individuality, inspiration, nonsense, positivity, wish, world

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My favorite things about Texas are definitely toast and chainsaw massacres.

0

2 months ago

chainsaw, favorite, humor, massacre, quirky, stereotype, Texa, things, toast
I miss when The Weeknd made haunted strip club music. Didn’t know how good I had it.

0

2 months ago

club, good, good times, haunted, i, know, miss, music, nostalgia, strip, strip club, times, Weeknd
Coffee doesn’t solve all my problems. But it definitely stops me from constantly creating new ones.

0

2 months ago

caffeine, coffee, creativity, daily, daily life, humor, life, me, new, problems, relief, solutions, solve, stress, stress relief
Putting a hot frying pan into a sink running with cold water makes me feel like a blacksmith.

0

5 months ago

blacksmith, cold, cold water, cooking, feel, frying, frying pan, hot, hot pan, humor, kitchen, me, metaphor, pan, putting, running, sink, water
Most venomous snakes just make “Tsssss”. But I know some that say “Hi”.

0

2 months ago

greeting, humor, i, just, know, nature, personality, say, snake, surprise, venom, wildlife
Don’t be ashamed of who you are, that is your parent’s job.

0

2 months ago

family, humor, identity, job, joke, parent, parents, personality, self-acceptance, shame

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

78 shares on Messenger this month:

I took a pole and found that 100% of people in the tent were angry.

79 shares on Twitch this month:

I decided to be me and now we have a problem.

66 shares on Slack this month:

So many mistakes to make, so little time.

87 shares on Discord this month:

I’m a strong, independent woman, but like, against my will.

14 shares on X this month:

Why are those Mad Max guys always driving around, it’s not like there’s anywhere to go?

59 shares on Discord this month:

Saw a guy reading a book and writing notes in it. Not enough words in there for ya, bud?

29 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t have any patience because it takes too long.

18 shares on Telegram this month:

I’ve literally never copied and pasted text and thought, “I’m so glad it kept the formatting and font from the other document.”

75 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Pleasing everyone, that’s impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake!

76 shares on Messenger this month:

Sorry for being late, I was enjoying my last few minutes of not being here.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

I like people who can admit their mistakes and apologize. In other words, I like very few people.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

Hey kid, wanna hear a scary story? One day, you will be able to do whatever you want, and you will choose to stay home alone.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

We all got a little Barbie in us (the microplastics).

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

I usually don’t flirt, so if I flirt with you, please cooperate.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Before the internet, going viral meant your drawing made it to the fridge, and your sibling was furious.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

You realize you’re getting old when your body parts start fighting over which one hurts first.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

I call my smoke detector Gordon Ramsay, because every time I cook it screams at me.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

I think I’m emotionally constipated because I haven’t given a shit in months.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

You either die a people pleaser, or live long enough to start leaving texts on read.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

Dear food, either stop being so delicious or stop making me fat.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

Last night the Internet stopped working so I spent a few hours with my family. They seem like good people.

Trending via Instagram:

People are teaching their dogs how to skateboard and my dog’s chart at the vet says “must be picked up, won’t walk”.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I’m saving money on rent by moving into an abandoned cobweb.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Most of your problems emanate from assuming that you are intelligent. Ease into your stupidity, and be free.

Broadcasted on X:

I would describe my personal style as whatever is on top of the pile of clothes on the floor.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Nothing rattles me like the difference between rows and columns, man. I hate it so much.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Nothing prepared me for the part of adulthood where you look like a baby deer learning to walk every time you get out of bed in the morning.

Just shared via Instagram:

I haven’t had sex in so long, I forgot how to moan, what if I mess up and bark?

Going viral on Pinterest:

Used shampoo containing caffeine. My hair is already on its way to work.

Breaking via Messenger:

Problems are like balls. Everyone thinks they have bigger ones than you.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Be the nonsense you wish to see in the world.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

My favorite things about Texas are definitely toast and chainsaw massacres.

I miss when The Weeknd made haunted strip club music. Didn’t know how good I had it.

Coffee doesn’t solve all my problems. But it definitely stops me from constantly creating new ones.

Putting a hot frying pan into a sink running with cold water makes me feel like a blacksmith.

Most venomous snakes just make “Tsssss”. But I know some that say “Hi”.

Don’t be ashamed of who you are, that is your parent’s job.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨