Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

I am under no obligation to make sense to you.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

The sole purpose of some household items is to make it impossible for you to open the damn drawer.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

People who grew up with money will look you in the eyes and ask you something insane like, “Do you ski?”

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Am I the only person who hates spending the night at someone’s place? Like, we can hang out until 3 a.m., but I’m still going home.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

I always figure it out on my own, I just need to panic first.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

At this point, Tom Cruise is a stuntman who does his own acting.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

Mister Sandman, bring me a meme. Make it the dumbest shit that I’ve ever seen.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

My only goal in life is to never end up on a Netflix documentary.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

I miss making out in public and making people feel uncomfortable.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

If you drink enough, any bar can be a karaoke bar.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,532

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Slack:

Normalize arguing with plants who refuse to stay alive.

Live now on Pinterest:

Can’t threaten me with screenshots. I’ll get a microphone and say it again.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money.

Seen just now on Messenger:

The worst thing is finding out the “sweet guy” is just a lustful loser.

Seen just now on Messenger:

You don’t get much engagement? Have you tried being retarded.

Just shared via Pinterest:

At the grocery store, but forgot my wife’s list so I guess I’ll just follow this other guy around and get what he gets.

Going bananas on Discord:

Twitter can teach you a lot of lessons. Grammar is not one of them.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Good morning. May your day be as beautiful as I am.

Making waves on Messenger:

Welcome to your 50s. If you don’t have a mysterious ailment, one will be assigned to you shortly.

Breaking via Facebook:

I am cool with January lasting forever because rent is due February 1.

Cancel culture has been canceled.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like cancel culture just got a taste of its own medicine! 🚫✨ Time to hit "unsubscribe" on that trend! 😉 #CancelledCulture

cancel, cancel culture, canceled, commentary, culture, humor, irony, satire, social, social commentary, society, trends

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Nobody plays better together than siblings being told it’s bedtime.

0

2 months ago

bedtime, being, better, childhood, family, fun, laughter, nobody, play, sibling, together
Being sober would be a lot easier if I liked myself.

0

2 months ago

addiction, being, easier, humor, i, lot, myself, reflection, self-acceptance, self-esteem, sober, struggle
There should be bloopers at the end of horror films to relax the viewer before sleeping.

0

3 weeks ago

before, bloopers, credits, end, end credits, film, films, horror, horror film, movie, relax, should, sleep, sleeping, viewer
Stop asking a clown why he keeps acting like a clown, ask yourself why you keep going to the circus.

0

3 months ago

acting, ask, asking, behavior, circus, clown, going, humor, keep, keeps, self-reflection, stop, why, yourself
I think I’ma end the year with a plot twist, everyone hold on tight.

0

2 months ago

anticipation, end, everyone, hold, hold on, humor, i, plot, plot twist, surprise, think, tight, twist, year
I’m at my most math when I solve a problem while creating three new ones.

0

2 months ago

challenge, create, humor, i, irony, math, new, paradox, problem, solve, three

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

31 shares on Reddit this month:

I want to text this person, but I need to have shame and self-respect.

83 shares on Messenger this month:

I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

72 shares on Instagram this month:

Every time the universe sends me a sign, I’m like, okay, but I think I’ll wait for a signier sign.

83 shares on WeChat this month:

Like an advent calendar, you make me want to open up more every day.

85 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m giving up eating chocolate for a month. Sorry, bad punctuation. I’m giving up. Eating chocolate for a month.

56 shares on Slack this month:

Super excited for a brand new week of hoping for the best, but expecting the worst.

60 shares on Reddit this month:

Dear liars, I hope every pair of pants you own are on fire.

86 shares on TikTok this month:

That was a nice hour long Twitter scroll. Feel much worse as always. See you guys tomorrow.

53 shares on Facebook this month:

A big part of aging is accumulating keys and not knowing what they’re for.

58 shares on Twitch this month:

Americans can choose from over 1,000 breakfast cereals but only two presidential candidates?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

Home is where you can walk around like a bum.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

I miss the old days back in the 70s, when I didn’t exist.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

The main function of the little toe on your foot is to make sure that all the objects and furniture in the house are in the correct place.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

Facebook should just go back to being Hot or Not dot com.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

I prefer people who actually know what’s going on.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

I’m at an age where I don’t have to go anywhere and I still have jet lag.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m not always a couch potato. For instance, right now I’m a chair potato, and later I’ll be a bed potato.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

I highly recommend having hobbies. It distracts you from things like falling in love.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

A McRib killed my tapeworm.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

Olympic gymnast: does the most amazing thing I have ever seen in my entire life. Announcer: Oh dear, that will be a point deduction.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

I found out my wife was cheating on me at a Red Hot Chili Peppers concert, and I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

Live now on Threads:

I like to play this fun game while I clean out the fridge called what is this, how long has it been in here and how do I kill it?

Spotted on WeChat:

Anyone know which wine pairs well with societal collapse?

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Welcome to your 40’s: oh you like surprises? here’s another chin. Surprise!

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Hired a financial advisor, and his first piece of advice was that I don’t make nearly enough money to justify paying a financial advisor.

Making waves on Facebook:

I think airplanes would be way cooler if the wings flapped like a bird.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Might start a YouTube channel “will it hurt if I drop it on my foot”.

Just landed via Reddit:

I started calling the new guy at work “Grok” because he thinks he knows everything.

Spotted on YouTube:

I like that they put all that stuff outside for you to look at when you’re on a walk.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Cancel culture has been canceled.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Nobody plays better together than siblings being told it’s bedtime.

Being sober would be a lot easier if I liked myself.

There should be bloopers at the end of horror films to relax the viewer before sleeping.

Stop asking a clown why he keeps acting like a clown, ask yourself why you keep going to the circus.

I think I’ma end the year with a plot twist, everyone hold on tight.

I’m at my most math when I solve a problem while creating three new ones.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨