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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

I’m looking forward to tomorrow. It’ll be much like today, but different enough to confuse me.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

Relationships: Because sometimes destroying your life is a two person job.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

Parallel lines have got so much in common, it’s a shame they’ll never meet.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

If we start flirting now, we could be in matching pajamas on a Christmas card before the holidays.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Everyone who got my kids board games for Christmas, when are you coming back to play with them?

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

If you’re happy and you know it, you’re clearly not paying enough attention.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

Hey, I noticed you’re completely uninterested in me and couldn’t care whether I live or die. Would you like to build a life together?

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, getting ready for work, getting some sleep for work, or thinking about not wanting to go to work.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

I started at the bottom and worked my way down.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,775

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I don’t mind driving in bad weather. I mind other people driving in bad weather.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Awkward is the new sexy. At least that’s what I’m telling myself, so I don’t cry in front of strangers.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

The problem with people starts when we expect things from them, or have anything to do with them.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

We should make a new internet that’s as hard to use as the old internet was, so anyone that’s too stupid to have used the internet 20 years ago can’t get on it.

Just shared via Discord:

If I were a bird, you’d be the first person I’d shit on.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

The next James Bond should be weird. Like he wears a train conductor’s hat and is afraid of balloons.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Welcome, new followers! It’s all downhill from here.

Breaking via WeChat:

Just bought a new umbrella for the person that finds it tomorrow.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

All billionaires must submit a list of five things they did for society in the last week or their wealth shall be confiscated.

Just shared via Facebook:

I haven’t bought 1 Christmas gift but I got 3 packages on the way for me though.

Home is where the clothes rack stands in the way.

1 month ago

Funny quote about home life with clutter; playful, relatable humor on everyday chaos.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Home is where the heart is… but also where the clothes rack decides to throw a little obstacle course for you! 🏠👖 Who knew a simple piece of furniture could make navigating your own space a fun challenge! 🤣 #HomeSweetObstacleCourse"

clothes, clothes rack, everyday, everyday life, home, humor, life, obstacle, rack, where

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on WeChat this month:

A fun thing to do on a first date is wear a wedding dress.

41 shares on Facebook this month:

The secret to a good marriage is that it’s all about give and take. Giving each other frequent back rubs and ordering lots of takeout.

32 shares on X this month:

I’m going to die from jealousy one day.

77 shares on Facebook this month:

My favorite part of The Godfather is when the guy wakes up and screams because the Mafia has stolen the bottom half of the horse he keeps in his bed.

90 shares on TikTok this month:

I will not accept a hint. I will act dumb until you say it clearly to me.

83 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you’re in first class on a flight, sometimes they upgrade you to captain.

82 shares on Messenger this month:

I wish I could get a bouquet of mozzarella sticks.

100 shares on Discord this month:

Geopolitics for dudes is like pure sex. Almost like the male mind was built for this.

68 shares on Messenger this month:

Replying to all emails with “ya think?”.

87 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t follow washing instructions, you’re my clothes you don’t tell me what to do.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Is it better to beat someone to the punch or punch someone to the beat?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Given the amount of clowns around here, you’d think it would be more entertaining.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Listen, before I had my coffee I didn’t know how awesome I was going to be today either.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Can I do better? Yes. Will I do better? Probably not.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ll marry your mom just so I can ground you.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I logged on to Amazon and they said that they have run out of things that I don’t need.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Any place is a walkable city if you’re broke enough.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I have absolutely no desire to stay in the loop.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The difference between a hippo and a zippo is that one is really heavy and the other is a little lighter. Thank you and good night.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Waking up early is cool until it starts feeling like you’ve had a long day at 10 a.m.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,412

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Oh, that gap on my resume is from when I was the architect of my own hell.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Watching a movie on the plane? No thanks. Watching my seatmate’s movie with no audio and not understanding what’s going on for over an hour? Yassss.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

Beer is like weed for people with jobs.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Going down a rabbit hole if anyone wants anything.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

The way that we’re constantly told not to eat silica gel makes me suspect that it contains all the world’s forbidden knowledge.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Job hunting has legitimately been the most demoralizing experience of my life. Nothing else will make you realize how little you can actually do.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

Don’t talk to me while my earphones are in, man, I’m at a concert.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Never lie to Indian girls. That red dot be recording everything.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

If you think I’m funny, you should hear the voices in my head.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Me going to work because I’m too honest to scam people, too shy to be an influencer, too good for a sugar daddy, and too dumb for crypto.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

They should invent a day where it all works out.

Trending via Telegram:

The dopamine hit of getting an Outlook meeting cancellation is unrivaled.

Spotted on Instagram:

How many of you also constantly take screenshots of something and then never look at them again?

Going viral on YouTube:

Sometime you meet such a prince that you’d rather marry the horse.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Pornhub should do a wrap-up of your year like Spotify does.

Breaking via Threads:

I’m so old, I still keep special moments in my heart and not in my Insta story.

Trending via TikTok:

Ctrl Alt delete my fat.

Trending via Slack:

Someone has left me a voicemail. I don’t know what to do. Open the phone app? The contacts? Do I turn on the TV?

Trending via WhatsApp:

The note on this boxed wine says ‘Fresh up to 6 weeks after opening’. 6 weeks. Lol.

Spotted on X:

According to my Spotify Wrapped, I am what got played the most this year.

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