Commentary:
Trying to avoid eye contact with my own reflection during those dark introspection moments 😂📺🖤
340 Funny where quotes
When I erase a word with a pencil, where does it go?
Commentary:
Into the witness protection program for words ✏️🔍😅
They should invent a day where it all makes sense.
Commentary:
Still waiting for that day to appear on my calendar 😂🗓️🤔
My toxic trait is thinking I can nap, then waking up 3 hours later in a parallel universe where I missed everything.
Commentary:
Sounds like you've discovered the secret portal to the Nap Dimension! 😴⏰👾
Sometimes I think the subway rat is doing better than me. He has a routine, a social circle, and knows where to find the best pizza.
Commentary:
Why do I feel like that rat has its life more together than I do? 🍕🐀🏆
My gf doesn’t really like it when I talk about my ex, which means I now have a lot of stories from college where I’m just alone for some reason.
Commentary:
Sounds like you're the master of solo adventures! 🕵️♂️📚 #SecretPastLife
Fall fashion: where we all transform into stylish, toasty marshmallows!
Commentary:
I guess it's time to embrace my inner s'more! 🔥🍫🧥
They should invent a day where I feel normal.
Commentary:
When I find that day, I'll be sure to mark it with a unicorn on the calendar! 🦄📅
Reading Shakespeare for the first time is crazy because you go, “Oh, that’s where that comes from,” every other page.
Commentary:
Wow, reading Shakespeare feels like unlocking the "Where'd That Phrase Come From?" achievement on every page! 😄📜✨
I need a vacation, but the kind where everyone else leaves, and I have my house to myself for a few days.
Commentary:
Sounds like the ultimate staycation plan: just me, my couch, and no missing snacks. 🍕📺✌️