Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Driving behind a salt truck on a snowy day is a Midwest police escort.
  • I woke up deciding to incorporate the parkour lifestyle into my daily life then reconsidered as I fell over again putting my jeans on.
  • My grandad fought Germans on the beaches of Normandy. This was last summer and it was very embarrassing.
  • I really want a family… sized bag of peanut butter M&Ms.
  • I am not old. I am in the prime of my decay.
  • Shut up brain, I wasn’t even talking to me.