Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Online shopping gives me a reason to live for another 3-5 business days.
  • I’m a multi-tasking procrastinator. I can put off multiple things at once.
  • Being single past 30 is like playing hide and seek, except no one is looking for you.
  • We all know that mirrors don’t lie. I’m just very grateful that they don’t laugh.
  • I get it cicadas, I’m ready to scream for six weeks too.
  • Sometimes, in the middle of eating a rotisserie chicken, I ask myself “did I just run a red light?”