Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hrs, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

I’m putting free wifi on my gravestone, so people will come visit me.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

I feel like we’re on like the 50th or 60th horseman of the apocalypse by now.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Everyone hates on Gollum but he had the right idea: become a hermit, collect jewels, swim naked in lakes and pools, occasionally hiss at people who try to make you go places.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

People who live alone should get one practice conversation before they have to speak out loud for the first time that day.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Every family needs a delusional daughter who is ambitious about relieving all her family’s struggles solely by winning the lottery one day.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

Sorry to interrupt your scrolling, but I hope life gets better for you.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

Sorry, I can’t tonight. I’m busy taking things personally.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Look away from your laptop for 1 second, and MS Teams will say you left the country.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Gonna run this by my two best friends who are as insane as I am.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,823

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

Looking to sell my DeLorean. Great shape, low mileage. Only driven from time to time.

Just landed via Instagram:

If you need me, I’ll be in the shower pretending I can sing.

Going viral on TikTok:

If you’re not happy single you won’t be happy married. Happiness comes from eating food, not from relationships.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

A man’s home is his castle, but his garage is his sanctuary.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

In case anyone hasn’t told you today, I’m beautiful.

Spotted on Instagram:

Ever look at someone and think you could spend the rest of your life saying “What?” to this person?

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

If anime hair were real, there would be so much color dysmorphia. Like, imagine getting brown. I would be so pissed.

Going viral on WeChat:

Dude, we’re biting off more than we can chew tonight if you want to pull up.

Just landed via Twitch:

A cheat code to adulting is to always have something to look forward to, no matter how small or big.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Capri Sun tastes as if scientists had bet that they could make fruit juice without fruit.

I just sneezed next to my computer and the anti-virus popped up.

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like your computer's immune system is on high alert! 🤧💻 Better watch out for those virtual germs! 😉🛡️ #TechHumor

anti-virus, computer, humor, i, joke, just, next, sneeze, technology

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If you like someone, set them free. If they comeback, it means nobody liked them. Set them free again.

0

2 months ago

advice, again, comeback, free, freedom, friendship, humor, love, means, nobody, relationship, return, set, someone
Messed up and threw a surprise party for my minimalist friend. Now 25 of us are hiding behind the granite orb.

0

1 month ago

25, friend, friends, funny situation, granite, granite orb, hiding, mess, mess up, minimalist, orb, party, situation, surprise, surprise party, unexpected, us
Vegetables are actually pretty good when they’re fried.

0

4 months ago

actually, cooking, food, fried, frying, good, humor, pretty, taste, vegetable, vegetables
I come from a long line of people with something wrong with them.

0

3 months ago

ancestry, family, flaw, genetics, humor, i, inheritance, line, people, quirk, something, wrong
It’s been my experience that people seem a lot nicer before we get married.

0

2 months ago

expectations, experience, humor, marriage, married, nice, people, relationship
Since you’re all so in love, switch phones for Valentine’s Day!

0

1 month ago

activity, day, fun, fun activity, funny suggestion, humor, love, phone, relationship, relationship humor, suggestion, switch, switch phone, valentine’s, Valentine’s Day

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

61 shares on Reddit this month:

Why is it that your clothes only get caught on the door handle when you’re in a bad mood?

87 shares on WhatsApp this month:

90% of the ocean is unexplored, which means there could be a McDonald’s down there.

99 shares on YouTube this month:

Of course I intermittently fast. That’s when I sleep.

86 shares on Slack this month:

Women don’t pretend anymore to dig for something in their purse and then pull out their middle finger.

27 shares on Discord this month:

What do you mean I overthink things (as I wonder if I hurt my dog’s feelings by liking cat videos on Instagram)?

64 shares on Telegram this month:

I am the human version of tangled headphones.

42 shares on Facebook this month:

“Hey you!” is short for “I have no idea what your name is.”

70 shares on Telegram this month:

I get it dogs, I wish I could also bark at strangers approaching my house.

82 shares on Messenger this month:

Winter is actually awesome because if you put on a couple of movies at 5 p.m., it’s already pitch black and the evening is super long, so it feels like you’re staying up til 2 a.m., but in reality, it’s only 11 p.m. 10/10!

43 shares on Twitch this month:

The first time people saw a train coming at them, they ran away in terror.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

Do crabs underwater think that fishes fly?

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Subtitles are for when you’re eating chips.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

Are you telling me these billionaires don’t have my best interests at heart?!

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

“Lmao” has survived and even thrived over the years, but its cousin “rofl” has faded into indignity. The cruelty of fate.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

I figured out how they built the pyramids. No internet.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

I could win awards for having a bad memory. In fact, I probably did. How would I know.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Pleasing everyone, that’s impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake!

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

That awkward moment when you’ve said “What?” three times, so you just say “Oh, yeah..” even though you have no idea what they said.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Germany is now advising people to stock up on cheese and sausages. This is called the Wurst Käse scenario.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

Every Friday, I’m like, “This weekend I’m getting my life together,” and then… I don’t.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I think some of you are faking your sarcasms.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I thought the noise my husband’s stomach was making was never going to end last night until I realized it was a motorbike outside.

Breaking via Pinterest:

As I’m moonwalking away, they didn’t even notice I had stolen a brownie.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

My account is fake, I’m actually your probation officer.

Just landed via TikTok:

My wife asked me to put ketchup on the shopping list that I was making, and now, I can’t read anything.

Spotted on YouTube:

FaceTiming me is for platinum members only.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I ghost family members too, so believe me, bro — it’s not personal.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Two sheep walk into a baaaaa.

Making waves on Threads:

Your opinions are not my business.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Hangman is so great. No better way for a child to learn how to spell than by having to save a man from hanging to death.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

I just sneezed next to my computer and the anti-virus popped up.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

If you like someone, set them free. If they comeback, it means nobody liked them. Set them free again.

Messed up and threw a surprise party for my minimalist friend. Now 25 of us are hiding behind the granite orb.

Vegetables are actually pretty good when they’re fried.

I come from a long line of people with something wrong with them.

It’s been my experience that people seem a lot nicer before we get married.

Since you’re all so in love, switch phones for Valentine’s Day!

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨