Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the struggle of having a mind that operates at the speed of light while others seem stuck in slow motion. It's like trying to process a whole buffet of nonsense in one bite – a true test of mental digestion!"

humor, just, listening, me, process, stupidity, time, wit

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Like a fine bourbon, we get better with age. Or, at least, … we feel better about our age after drinking lots of bourbon!

0

5 months ago

after, age, aging, alcohol, better, bourbon, drinking, feel, feeling, feeling better, fine, fine bourbon, humor, least
Welcome to your 40s: you’re not having a midlife crisis, you’re just awake.

0

2 months ago

40s, adulthood, aging, awake, crisis, having, humor, just, midlife, self-awareness, welcome
I get it cicadas, I’m ready to scream for six weeks too.

0

2 months ago

cicada, frustration, humor, i, nature, ready, scream, six, six weeks, summer, too, weeks
I do not know how to put this gently, but part of being a good driver is using the gas and brake as little as humanly possible.

0

6 months ago

advice, being, brake, car, driver, driving, gas, gently, good, humor, i, know, little, put, skill, using
I think my dog always follows me to the bathroom because I always follow him outside and he thinks that’s the way it works.

0

2 months ago

bathroom, dog, follow, humor, loyalty, misunderstanding, outside, pet, relationship
When intelligence meets empathy and kindness, it’s so sexy.

0

5 months ago

attraction, compliment, empathy, humor, intelligence, kindness, personality, personality traits, sexy, traits

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

96 shares on WeChat this month:

Genies are a myth perpetuated by creepy lamps who just want to get rubbed more.

53 shares on TikTok this month:

Just burned 2,000 calories trying to avoid someone I know at Walmart.

27 shares on Slack this month:

Am I just getting old or are people getting more annoying?

32 shares on WeChat this month:

Oops, I accidentally healed too much. I am now uninterested in anyone but mẹ.

22 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t always leave the house, but when I do, I shouldn’t.

29 shares on YouTube this month:

My kids are smart but sometimes they say dumb stuff like, “Mom, why do you always buy Snickers when you’re the only one who likes them?”

34 shares on Messenger this month:

Does everyone in the world want to come to my house tomorrow?

71 shares on Instagram this month:

Getting excited to go to bed is a different level of adulting.

13 shares on Facebook this month:

If being hydrated is such a great thing, why does it feel like my bladder is pissed off?

98 shares on WeChat this month:

That awkward moment, when all eyes are on the bride, but your son is the groom.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

If your girlfriend doesn’t go a little psycho on you from time to time, then she’s not in love with you, sweetie.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

Good luck to everyone out there trying to gather enough energy to function this week.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

If you respond, “A reason for living,” when a store employee asks if they can help you find something, they will leave you alone.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

How am I supposed to relax when there are things?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

Every outdoor cat should be given a little cowboy hat and a gun.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

This year, the feliz is not navidading.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

An app where you and your partner swipe left and right on restaurants until there’s a match. No talking, no negotiation. Who’s building this?

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

No matter how sad their story is, don’t let anybody move into your house.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

Don’t invite me if there’s nowhere to sit down.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

If you wake up early enough, you can go back to sleep for a few hours. Not everyone knows this.

Going viral on Slack:

My main takeaway from ‘The Walking Dead’ is that you can still eat the expired canned goods in your pantry.

Going bananas on Discord:

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

Freshly posted on Threads:

It’s jarring for me when there are British people in the Midwest. How did you get this far inland?

Just landed via Pinterest:

You didn’t let me know you got home safely so you better at least be injured or I’m gonna be pissed.

Making waves on Telegram:

Don’t be part of the problem. Be all of it.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Vaping always looked dumb. It looks like you’re smoking a kazoo, and now the lead poisoning is the cherry on top.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I’m at the age where I understand why my parents never wanted to stop for anything on the way home from work.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Life is like a helicopter. I don’t know how to operate a helicopter.

Spotted on Snapchat:

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a kid that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

No, no, I’m listening, it just takes me some time to process so much stupidity all at once.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Like a fine bourbon, we get better with age. Or, at least, … we feel better about our age after drinking lots of bourbon!

Welcome to your 40s: you’re not having a midlife crisis, you’re just awake.

I get it cicadas, I’m ready to scream for six weeks too.

I do not know how to put this gently, but part of being a good driver is using the gas and brake as little as humanly possible.

I think my dog always follows me to the bathroom because I always follow him outside and he thinks that’s the way it works.

When intelligence meets empathy and kindness, it’s so sexy.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨