Remember: The first step to recovery is addiction.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Why do these women want to date Pete Davidson, a funny movie star, and not me, a guy who is whining?

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

I know how to use an abacus as a tambourine.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

You unfollow me because you are afraid of falling in love with me. I know!

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

You can use an egg timer to tell you when your egg is cooked perfectly. For brown rice you can use a calendar.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

When I die, I want to come back as a speed bump so I can piss people off.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

Not to brag, but no one has ever accused me of trying too hard.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

The man who invented autocorrect walks into a barn. He orders a bear.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

I don’t always carry all the groceries on one arm, but when I do, my keys are in the wrong pocket.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is realizing that the other person is completely stupid.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

My mirror needs a screenshot button.