Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.
  • Where do they get the seeds to plant seedless watermelons?
  • Me as the therapist: “Listen, just take a nap!”
  • I’ve realized about a third of my life is spent trying to ignore the fact that I have to pee.
  • I wish I could lose weight as easily as I lose my keys, phone, temper, and my mind.
  • If your man cheats on you, dump him and date his dad, make him your step son.