Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I received a bank alert text for suspicious activity. I was buying fruit.
  • I wish religion made people nicer to each other.
  • Blaming the full moon for whatever unhinged decision I make tonight.
  • The best part about filling out doctor appointment forms online is when you get there and they say “hello, please fill out these forms!”
  • When you meet twins, demand to speak with the one in charge.
  • Maybe the wolf from The Neverending Story still has nightmares about me, too.