Men tell you “I know a place” and bring you to the brink of madness.

If you’re just talking nonsense all the time and not thinking about what you’re doing, you’re either in love or at the office.

Looking for someone who loves me as much as some people love standing up the second a plane lands.

Love is in the air fryer.

Love is like a bird. Sometimes flying around me but then moving on.

At this point, I’m sure I’ll meet an alien or zombies before I meet the love of my life!

I love sleeping so much that it is the first thing I think about when I wake up.

Don’t fall in love. It’s bad.

If you love someone be brave enough to tell them. Otherwise be brave enough to watch them dating someone else.

Bring me a higher love. You have 24 hours. No cops.

Driving is great because it combines my love of sitting with my love of being mad.

You unfollow me because you are afraid of falling in love with me. I know!

I wish I loved anything as much as my two year old loves pulling my pants down.

I thought my friends in their 60s were making love in the other room but they were just putting on their socks.

If you don’t want to be in love with me that’s fine. You’re entitled to your wrong and very stupid opinions.