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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to cancel plans.
  • Every once in a while, I go outside and run the vacuum cleaner on the driveway, just to make sure the neighbors never talk to me.
  • Hey, boy, are you the worst-case scenario? Because you’re all I think about.
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  • When someone asks me why I’m leaving the party early, I say “I’m late for an appointment with my pajamas.”